⚠️Please be aware that the following content is the sole part of my imagination and has nothing to do with the mentioned idol⚠️
"I am going to make you regret every second of this marriage, Kim Taehyung." She declared on the very first day of their...
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Y/N'S POV ::
Taehyung is the very first person I've disclosed my past to after my therapist. But he is definitely the first person I've cried in the arms of. Not even Fredrick knows about how Jia died but he knows she is dead. That's all.
However, Taehyung now knows the deepest and darkest part of me.
Few months ago,I wouldn't have believed myself to cry in the arms of the man I wanted to strangle so many times. Still, I found a serenity in his arms. The calm to my chaos. I threw myself in his arms, held him like I was drowning and he was the only solution for my survival, like he is the only one who'd actually pull me up and he did.
I've never initiated a hug first. I've never craved physical affection and I for sure never found peace in that department. The moment I was buried in his chest, his scene reaching my lungs, his breath fanning over my skin, erupting goosebumps and sending tingles down my spine, I felt safe. Like I could finally let go.
Maybe it was only my episode. Just a part of it.
The thing is, Taehyung has reached the part of me which no one has ever done and I've never allowed anyone to touch that part of me. He did. He finally reached me. The thought fills me up with dread and fear. The anxiety crawls at my skin the more I think about the whole situation that happened last night.
No one was supposed to know about this. Some people knew that my mother lost her kid but many had no idea about it and thought I was the only daughter she'd ever had after Jia was long buried six feets under.
My breath suddenly gets stuck in my throat. I've never talked about this with anyone but my therapist and it was years ago. During the junior year of my college. Now that Taehyung knows, I don't know what to feel about it. He was so calm and casual.
"You didn't kill her."
The one sentence I've yearned to hear since that dreadful night but no one told me. Not even my brother. Sungmin always told me that it was an accident but he never told me that it's not my fault and I didn't kill her. I've been living with the weight since then.
It was never an easy topic to talk about with Taehyung, my words floated like water. They seemed and felt light on my tongue. Again, I'm sure it was a part of my episode. I saw her in my dream, wearing a white dress which was drenched with blood. She kept chanting to be saved and by the time I reached out to her, it was too late.
"You could've saved me but you didn't."
Her voice rings in my brain, clearing all the good thoughts that Taehyung has managed the plant somehow. The breakfast which I had shoved down my throat by the force, churns in my stomach. Bile rises up my throat and I push myself off from the bed as I rush inside the bathroom. I hold onto my stomach as I empty the insides in the toilet.
