Chapter 59: Sharp Words Cut Deep, Dear

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Akari waited patiently for the (h/c) haired girl to respond to his explanation. He didn't dare make eye contact with her. Now she knew why. At least, she understood just a bit more. She still didn't know why he recognized her as a goddess at first sight and she didn't recall ever meeting him. Then again, she was the best at remembering certain things, especially if, as he said, someone came to take her away from the park. He wasn't lying.

All she needed to know was in his story. The male snuck out, away from Rei, away from Vethela, and away from his home just to see her. Clearly, his priority was her, not Rei. That meant that Akari really was on her side; that he was going to defend her and help her whenever she wanted. The news should have made her feel immense joy and hope, but all that she was feeling was anguish. Why, of anyone, did she have to forget Akari? She could have really used someone like him. Then again, he'd always been looking out for her whether she asked him or not.

"So, that's it?" she blushed, not really sure how to feel but experiencing great embarrassment nonetheless, "You're on my side."

"I always have been," the blonde mumbled, "I just...mess up a lot. I-I didn't mean for everyone to get so weird about you. You have to believe me. I just...wanted to be near you."

(Y/n) didn't doubt that. He hadn't come to Keisetsu to reconnect with her or to use everything he knew about her to make her fall in love with him. In fact, at the multiple opportunities he had, he didn't talk to her, avoiding her as much as possible, if only because she would like that - having space. And, even when he did interact with her at first, he only gave her things she needed, offering up food or information. As she thought that, she gave a confused laugh, turning away from him. He really was one of a kind.

"I-I know I don't deserve it," Akari was quick to add, misunderstanding her reaction, "I'm not a good person and I've done so many bad things. I...I'm sure you saw in the journals. I just killed people to protect you, but...I still killed. Sorry. I shouldn't make excuses. I'm a monster."

Well, that was true. In fact, the blonde wasn't just a murderer. He was a serial killer. He had his own style of killing, he had his own motives, and he had a specific set of people he targeted. Though he clearly wasn't the serial killer that was after her, he was one nonetheless. That made him a monster. On that, most people would agree, and though Akari was self-aware about it, that didn't change the fact.

"I...I don't need you to love me," the blonde started crying, "I never wanted to force you to do anything. But, if you don't want me around you, I won't ever stalk you again. I promise. I'll leave you alone forever."

(Y/n) gave a long sigh. He didn't want that. All the same, he was still offering it, and she knew he meant it, too. Truthfully, she didn't know what she wanted just yet. At least, not with him. The blonde was sweet but he clearly had a dark side to him - one which she didn't know she could control. What she did know, however, is that, if she wanted to become free, she would need his help.

"If you really wanted me to abandon you, why would you tell me all that and that you're on my side?"

"Oh!" the blonde frantically exclaimed, shaking his head, "No, no! I wasn't trying to manipulate you! I-I want you to make the choice! It's your choice! I don't choose! Just...if you knew about everything...I thought you could make the best decision for you. It's never...It's not about me."

"Come on, Akari," she chuckled, leaning down to force him to look her in the eyes.

She couldn't get over his eyes. They were the most beautiful swirl of yellow and green like a never-ending field of summer daisies. He was welling up with tears, trying and failing to hold them back. They dropped one by one, rolling over his cheeks before he would quickly wipe it away. It was like he thought, if she couldn't see the tear, it never existed. He really was trying to stop himself from interfering with her decision. But, when he was staring up at her with those pitiful, beautiful eyes, it was so easy to forget he was a monster.

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