Heathen

|06|

Elodie

I'm jolted awake from a bad dream that I don't even remember, gasping for air and sweating from stress. I pant, desperate to get oxygen into my burning lungs.

It's dark. I can hardly see anything, only the blue moon from a window adjacent to the bed.

I glance around uneasily, half forgetting where I am. In a flash of lightening outside, I remember the giant that is Barre. I recall everything he did for me. He rescued me from the woods. Fed me. Fixed up my injuries. Gave me a warm bed to sleep in.

But he's not in the bed beside me, and that's what unsettles me. I wish he was with me. He makes me feel so safe.

I squint out the window, pulling the covers up to my chin as I eye the outside. I think of Locanas. He never gives up, never stops pursuing me. What would stop him now? He's probably out there still, leaving no rock unturned as he hunts me down. He could find me eventually.

The thought of him makes my stomach turn over. I feel nauseated. My heart thumps uneasily in my chest.

I want Barre. Really want him. He's everything I've ever wanted. A sweet, handsome man to take care of me, make me happy. But now I feel reluctant to pursue what I want. What if he thinks I'm ugly? What if he doesn't feel the same way? What if I just end up bothering him?

They're all questions screaming at me from the back of my mind. But right now, I just want him to hold me and help me chase the nightmares away. If I keep thinking about how I wish he was my mate, I'll go crazy.

I want to go to him now.

But, I second guess myself. I don't want to annoy him. He's sleeping. Barre has done so much for me already, he might not take kindly to me sneaking into his room and crawling into his arms.

I'll just have to tough it out. I'll be okay. At least, that's what I tell myself.

I lay still on my side, fluffing my pillow as I try to get comfortable enough to go back to sleep. I clutch the sheets in my fingers as rain somehow still comes down outside.

It rains a lot here, and I used to find the sound comforting. Then I thought about how the sounds could cover up someone outside trying to get in. He could be right outside the window for all I know.

Swallowing the lump in my throat, I look through the glass at the shadows of the forest. Something moves, and I close my eyes tight, trying not to sob as fear pinches every part of me.

My chin trembles as I hold everything in. The dark is terrifying, but I'm too scared to get up and search for a light switch.

What if Locanas sees me? What if he barges in and takes me away? Would Barre do anything about it? Would he let me go thinking I was safe with any Rytarian because they have "honor".

A tear slips down my cheek, and I'm quick to wipe it away. I don't want to be taken away from here. I don't want to go back to the palace, ever.

I miss Soleil, but I was so unhappy there. I was constantly looking over my shoulder, always hiding from the terror that Locanas brought.

I remember the first time I saw him. He was trudging through the woods, and I was chasing after Soleil. He took one look at me, and then pounced. I screamed. I fought. I flailed. I was no match for his strength. He simply threw me over his shoulder like I was a sack of potatoes.

His hand on my butt, holding me in place. He was cruel. Uncaring. And of all the girls, he wanted only me.

A crash of thunder claps outside, and I cry out. Throwing the covers back, I leap for the door through the dimness, almost crippling when I put weight on my hurt ankle, I recover and then I'm grappling for the knob. When I find it, I turn it and push the door wide open, hobbling down the hall.

I push my tears out of the way, desperate to find Barre's room. There's another door a few feet from mine, so I test my luck and reach for it.

Before I can even open it, it swings open, revealing a shirtless Barre towering over me. His two different colored eyes are awake and alert as ever. He must have heard me, and nothing seems to get past this hunter man

I guess that means that he would notice if someone broke in. That brings me a lot of comfort.

"I'm sorry, I couldn't sleep, I'm too scared." I tell him, wrapping my arms around myself to keep from throwing myself into his room.

He just sort of looks down at me, his muscles tensed and his eyebrows furrowed. I look away. Embarrassment flutters in me, growing to display across my face.

Another tear spills, and when I go to swipe it from existence, my hand encounters another battling for it's place. I glance up at Barre as he places his thumb on my cheek, gathering the tear on the pad of his finger as he swipes it.

He's standing so close to me. I stare at his pecs, his dark nipples. I gulp. I should not be ogling him. Just because Barre is half naked does not give me permission to be creepy.

"I'll just go back to bed." I murmur, trying to back up. I need to go to my room, even if I don't want to. He follows me with thunderous stomps. I glance down to see he's barefoot, I guess he's just heavy.

Barre latches onto my shoulders, once again steering me. This time, he's pulling me into his room. I want to sob with relief. It's too good to be true.

He closes the door behind us, and then walks into the dark room. I stand anxiously, not able to see a thing. I limp further into the room, using my hands to feel for anything in the way.

A light clicks on, and I see that Barre stands by a small lamp on the nightstand. It hardly illuminates the room, but I can see enough.

The room is spacier than the one I was in, the bed much bigger. It's thick, wooden logs are covered in pelts, and there's a fireplace on the far right wall. There's no fire in it, but there's lots of firewood stacked beside it.

I near the bed, it's solid wood, made out of thick tree branches. The dark covers that match are rumpled from someone sleeping in them. I watch that someone very carefully. He pulls the blanket back, gesturing to it.

I get closer, standing beside him before climbing onto the cush mattress. The bed is high, so I have to throw my leg over to pull the rest of my weight up. Barre's hand goes to my elbow, helping me up. I gulp.

The sheets are still warm. The pillows are soft, molding perfectly to my head. I sigh in content.

Barre slides in beside me, turning off the light, showering us in darkness. I feel his closeness, the heat of his skin. I want to move closer.

He starts to shift, and I freeze, holding my breath. He's so near that if I reach out I'll touch him. So, I do. My fingertips make contact with hot, hard skin and muscle. My breath catches.

Barre doesn't move away. So I slowly creep closer, wanting to feel him, wanting to be completely safe.

Finally, he wraps an arm around me, pulling me to his body. I don't protest. I want this. I need it.

Being in his grasp, I'm so secure. It's like Locanas disappears when Barre is here. I don't worry about being kidnapped, I don't hang onto every sound, my heart doesn't gallop from my scared thoughts.

I close my eyes, already drifting to a peace filled sleep that I've been craving for years.

Double update! Read on ❤️