Masks are Greater than Sunglasses [ COMPLETE ]

twenty two - a broken lie

Trigger warning: Talk of depression and thoughts / talk of suicide (nothing graphic) If you want to skip that section go down to the **.

Remember that you matter and you are so worth it. If you need help are you are in the US call 800-273-8255 or you can visit iasp.info/resources/ for international resources.

- Nick - 

At my words, I can see Rya's whole face go slack, for a second I think she's about to collapse and I itch to reach out and grab her but I know it won't be welcome. After a moment something flickers in her eyes and the steely resolve is back.

Folding my fingers into fists I press on, not wanting to waste anymore time. If I have only two minutes I better make them count, "You have no idea what it's like to be 16 and come home to find your father curing the disease that is Supers only to try and push the door to your room open and instead fall right through it."

I can feel my throat starting to close up but I continue. I have to get it all out there. I've waited too long for this moment not to tell her everything, "I thought I was a freak, a plague, something that shouldn't exist. I knew I couldn't stay at home, it was only a matter of time before father found out and who knows what he would do to me then. I couldn't leave though, he and Bella were the only people I had. I was stuck and I was desperate and I hated myself."

Rya's eyes are wide as comprehension finally dawns, her mouth forming a slack O. My fists tremble as I tighten them, forcing myself to keep going despite the pain building in my stomach. I've never told anyone this, not even Connor.

"It seemed like there was only one way out. It had to end, it was going to end." I take a shuddering breath before pressing on, "And then you were there, or Shadow anyway. I was on top of that building for an hour before you showed up but you just sat with me, you told me that being a Super was whatever I made of it. You showed me that there is humanity in people, enhanced or not. That's the day I decided to stop hating what I am. I knew it wasn't going to be easy but I had to try. That's the day I went to the League." I try and swallow but my throat is too dry. Despite the pain I'm almost relieved to say it out loud. It's cemented now, in the past. I'm stepping forward. 

I'm moving on and hopefully Rya can too.

I try to catch her eye but they are resolutely glued to the ground. Clearing my throat I try for a confident tone, "I never believed that you were a Villain."

"But I do," Rya's voice is a whisper. Pain. It resonates from her, it's filling the air, it's suffocating, a pressing, boiling, hatred that I've never felt before. This is not how I imagined meeting the women who saved my life. I thought I had prepared for anything, for her to be a real criminal, for a vigilante, even for her to be dead. Nothing could have prepared me for the loathing I can feel right now. I can only compare it to one thing, how I felt about myself all those years ago.

I ache to reach out to her, too in some way ease the torture that she's puttering herself through, but I know it wont be welcome. Any trust we had is gone now. Lies brought us together and now the truth is going to rip up apart. A week ago I couldn't have been happier if that happened. Avoiding people who hate Super is hard when you're shoved into protecting one.

But now, now I can't let her go. She saved my life once. The least I can do is help her now.

** Taking a step forward, I lower my voice, wishing that she would look up, "Whatever happened that day, it wasn't your fault."

She glares up at me through eyes sparkling with tears. Her breath hitches and an icy venom flashes in her eyes, "You can't know that."

"But I know you-"