Downfall | Austin Butler

Chapter 17

better off as friends
and i know
we're not perfect, love
but maybe i could be
worth it, love
— fall in love with you,
montell fish

——

If someone would've told me — bright and early this morning when I rolled out of my beautiful boyfriend of a bed — that I would be spending the rest of my day at the ER with one Austin Butler, I would've laughed so hard in their face.

So hard, that my voice would've been the loudest and most prominent on one of those laughing tracks. Like the ones they tossed in every two seconds on a thirty minute prime time television series — making some awful joke seem super fucking funny — when it was probably, the lamest joke in the book.

Funnily enough, this whole thing started to feel like a real sitcom the moment we waltzed in the automatic doors of the ER. With me on Austin's back — playing cowboys and all. I swore everyone's heads were turned to us. I could feel eyes boring from every goddamn direction, and it made my skin crawl. It only got worse when we finally pulled up to the front desk.

"Just give me one second," the receptionist slash nurse lady, clad in scrubs mumbled over to us. Biting her lip, she studied the screen in front of her carefully, clicking the mouse and all.

"Take your time," Austin replied. His voice of honey drew right out of him so sweetly — per usual — his back reverberating against my chest planted against him as he spoke. "You good up there?" he asked me quietly while we waited — so quietly that I almost didn't catch what he said from the commotion around us. The air was filled with a chaotic fever of chatter and beeping machines. "How's the weather?"

For one — no I was not good. Well a part of me at least. We were back to the way we were situated on his goddamn bike a week ago. So fucking close that I could feel the small whips of his blonde hair tickling against my cheek. So close that I was practically inhaling the scent of his usual cologne like a kid sniffing one of those fruity scented markers that were just so addicting — you'd lose your sense of smell for a week and just smell the fucking marker for an eternity and a half.  So close that I wanted to literally implode every time he spoke. Marveling in the way my entire body lit up whenever he opened his mouth, the vibrations from his words beating against my heart like a melody. It was driving me quite insane already, yet I couldn't admit that. I couldn't say such a thing to him. Because saying something like that to him would prove that I was insane, and I was far from insane.

He was the insane one.

I was oh-so sane! Duh!

As for the other part — that side of me was kind of eating this whole thing up. Even though I was mortified by this entire situation, I still found it kind of funny. Austin had managed to amuse me with his antics and childish games. He had jokes, and I was more than happy to play along with them to compensate for the fact that I was losing my shit deep down inside.

I let all that shit out with a deep breath. "Quite peachy," I mused, dropping my hands that were braced securely against his chest, lacing them together as they laid limp in front of Austin. "I have to say, it's kind of nice being taller than you for once."

"Hm," he hummed. "Is that so?"

"Yeah. It gives me the upper hand and all in this —" my voice died in my throat when he suddenly adjusted, hoisting me up so he could get a better grip of me against him. Either I was actually slipping from his hold or he was just using that as an excuse to be a butthead and cut off my teasing. "Ah!" I yelped, my hands  clawing at him once again for dear life. "Jesus! Give a girl a warning next time!" I lightly reprimanded him in his ear so only he could hear.