Silently In Tune (COMPLETE)

Nine: Consumption

Valerian Calix

I hummed the beat I imagined.

Drawing my ideas for instruments on a separate notebook that I gave to the guys.

But my notebook contained lyrics. Wordings. Ideas.

I want my next album to be erotic. Not just seductive.

I want it to be dark and deep and mean something.

About two souls erotically connecting.

I don't do bodies exactly, I don't talk about grabbing things unless I mention maybe thighs but I always play off the concept of desperation and yearning.

Those two things create a powerful bond between two people.

I also did that because I understood the depth of those feelings as I have them. I contain desperation and yearning.

I have no physical experience.

Half of that was distaste but now it developed into a thought that I didn't need to know how to do any of those things.

Experiences are different with every person, I want to be sexually molded to one person.

I want to know exactly how to kiss her.

How to hold her.

How to grab her.

Touch her.

Taste her.

I want everything that happens to me to be natural and because I was taught by her.

I want to have a blueprint of her body and what makes her go crazy.

How I have to massage her tits, her thighs, her ass in my hands.

The exact pressure I need, sucking on her clit, to make her back arch and thighs squeeze around my head.

How I need to pump and curl my fingers to hit her spot and make her scream my name.

I need to know how to pull her hair and make her submit to me and trust me.

I need to know what to say to drive her mind to the edge.

How to hold her down so every part of her is exposed to me.

Consume her so whenever I make a man leave her company she immediately forgives me and wraps her arms around me instead of scolding my attitude.

Half of me wanted to watch her be happy with friends.

The other half wanted to possess every part of her mind.

She shouldn't want anyone else. She only needed me.

But I wouldn't exhibit that in my behaviors. I understood it was toxic.

But she was my baby.

I'll see how long I last thinking rationally.

I set my journal down, reading the next chapter of Haunting Adeline.

Zade understood me.

Zade Meadows understood me to a tea.

My sweet girl was going to fall for me, she's going to be mine.

There was no debate.