The Virus Within: Secrets Unraveled (Book 5)

Ch 37: Wrestling Match

Ethan lowered his hand and took a deep breath, standing straighter. "I don't want them near those blood samples, but I like Nicky's idea. We can watch and guide them so they don't make any mistakes. Otherwise, they'll try by themselves."

"We can move anything Terror-related into the main lab and make that a Nina-only zone," Nicky said with a shrug. "It's easy enough. Just bring another trailer over for them to work in. Once they know the zombies will be checking for any scent trails, they won't even stick a toe in there."

Nina looked at Daniel. "Can you ask this place if they can bring another trailer for a second lab? Possibly two if they're smaller since there are seven assistants."

"I'll see what I can find."

I added, "I suggest making them wait a day or so before coming. Give us some time to prepare."

Daniel nodded. "That would even give me time to go to Yersin and bring back the lab equipment."

"It would be good to have everything here," Ethan said slowly. "Although I'm not sure how long they'll stay. I was good friends with a couple of them, but they might leave once they know I'm here. They know what I did."

Nicky bounced to her feet, grabbed her water bottle, and walked in front of the zombie, who regarded her in confusion. Her sympathetic gaze met his downcast one. "If they are your friends, they'll know that you would never intentionally harm them. They knew they gave you an experimental drug that would mess with your mind. It shouldn't surprise them that your control slipped, especially if they hadn't brought you animal blood after turning."

"Hundreds died because of me," he said bitterly.

"You can't change the past, but let me ask you this: do you forgive them for giving you that serum before it was fully tested? Or will you hold that against them?"

I resisted the urge to shift my weight, halfway wishing to leave the vaguely uncomfortable discussion at hand. Helping someone with grief wasn't something I was good at, especially not with the virus making it far harder for me to feel that type of emotion. Yet, I remained in case Nicky landed herself in hot water, although this was the observative side of her that was very good at judging where her limits were.

Ethan blinked. "I won't let them create that serum again, but no, I don't hold it against them. They thought they had tested it sufficiently."

"Then why do you think they'll turn their backs on you?" The redhead's voice grew softer. "It won't ease the pain, and nothing will bring them back, but at least accept the fact that you weren't completely in control. Had you been, you wouldn't have harmed a hair on their heads. Don't you want to see if they're willing to talk with you? Maybe even continue being friends?"

He looked at her for a long time. In a wistful voice, he said, "I'd like to apologize to them, at the very least."

"That's a good starting point," Nicky said, sounding far more like Jess with these replies. "You're tearing yourself up inside with guilt and grief, and that's just as destructive to a zombie as it is to a human. We're willing to help you. If Nina's research finds a way to bring ferals back, there will be an awful lot of people responsible for deaths, and they're all going to need support as well."

"I guess..." he replied dubiously.

"My counselor once told me that it's never easy accepting help, or even admitting you need it." Nicky straightened her arm and held the water bottle out to the side. "See? The weight doesn't change, but the longer you hold it by yourself, the more your arm will ache. The same is true with stress, worries, and grief. The longer we try to hold it ourselves, the more it will hurt." Nicky tilted her head and added, "Then she said some weird shit like my sense of humor being the vinegar in the baking powder of people's patience."