Face The Music

Let's Party

 I ran upstairs so I could get changed. I threw off my sundress and pulled my short-sleeved, black maternity cocktail dress out of the closet, putting it on while my curling iron heated up. I redid all my makeup and then put some loose curls into my hair. Finished and perfect.

I met Hudson and Natty downstairs. We hopped into my mom's rental car so she could drop us off at the marina across the river. We only had a few minutes left to board by the time we got to the marina, so we made it just in the nick of time.

"Bye! Have fun guys!" my mom said as we rushed out of the car.

We got in line and caught our breath, then handed our tickets over to the guy standing by the boat's entrance. Once he said we were good to go, we entered the StarShip Yacht: a luxury dinner and party cruise.

The host showed us to our reserved table and we all sat down. The first thing I did was open the menu in front of me. I'd just eaten a huge piece of cake thirty minutes ago, and I was already hungry again.

"Okay I'm getting the ravioli. Done," I said, putting my menu down.

"You just had ravioli at lunch," Hudson said.

"And now I'm gonna have it again. That's what she wants," I said, patting my baby bump.

"Oh, got it. My princess Mia can always have whatever she wants," Hudson said, extending his hand and giving my bump a little rub.

I smiled. I was so proud of him. He'd gotten so much more comfortable with touching my baby bump lately. He'd come so far from the day when I almost had the abortion.

"Eww. Gross," Natty said.

"Hey, it's not like we're together. Then it would actually be gross," Hudson said. I giggled. "Girls are gross." He leaned in towards my bump and whispered, "Except for you, Princess."

The boat started moving and the server took our orders shortly after. We mocktailed and dined, since we were too young to wine and dine. My ravioli was absolutely on point, along with my virgin pina colada. After dinner they brought a chocolate lava cake topped with vanilla ice cream for dessert. Absolute heaven.

Once we were done eating, it was time to head to the top deck and do some dancing. I already had my high-heels taken off because that was so not happening with my swollen feet. The top deck had lots of room for everyone to spread out and dance. It was a warm, clear night. We could see all the stars out over Tampa Bay.

We made sure to take lots of pics as we all got our groove on. But it didn't take long for me to get tired, so Natty found some open seats for me near the bow of the boat. Hudson went downstairs to take a bathroom break, so it was just Natty and I.

"What's going on? I can read you like a book," she asked.

"I...I need you to promise not to tell Hudson," I said.

"My lips are sealed. Now spill it."

"You're gonna think it's really stupid."

"Don't care. Tell me."

I sighed. "When we were at the baby shower earlier, I just had this really weird fleeting thought that everything is too good to be true. What if everything isn't okay? What if there's something going on with Mia?"

"Seriously? I think you're having mom anxiety," she said.

"Yeah. I guess."

"She's been a hundred percent healthy at every single one of her appointments and her NIPT test three weeks ago came back as low risk for every single thing. She's fine. No, she's better than fine. She's legit perfect Deni. Don't worry."

"That's true. You're completely right. I think I'm just worrying too much," I said.

"Okay, I'm back! That dance floor's calling our name! Let's go!" Hudson said from behind us.

"Coming!" I said, getting up from my seat as fast as my pregnant self could.

We got back out to the dance floor and I did the best I could. It was hard to believe that I used to be a dancer. I thought I'd have a career on Broadway at a bare minimum, and now I was going to be a teen mom. I never thought my life would be this way.

But with my two close friends, the clear night, the sea breeze, the music, and coming off a great day with my family, it felt like I didn't even need the old life that I had. Because even though I had a great dance career and a lot more friends, I still didn't have what I have now: my Mia.

The music slowed down, I took a bathroom break, and then we sat down on the deck to grab some more pictures and just enjoy what was left of the night. We were headed back to the marina and docked a few minutes later. My mom was waiting for us there, and I was yawning. I used to party until three in the morning all the time, and now I was falling asleep at ten pm.

We got back to my grandparents' house, and after I took a shower, I fell asleep almost immediately. After I drifted off, I found myself in a strange dream. I was in a dark room, but a little girl was on the other side of it.

I walked over to where she was sitting, playing with a bunch of toys on the floor. She was dressed in a little white sundress. She looked like a little angel.

"Hi princess. What are you playing?" I asked, sitting down with her. She didn't answer. "Mia?" No answer. I scooted closer and put my hand around her arm. She looked up at me. "Mia, it's me. Mommy. Mom-my."

She smiled, her lips trying to form the words, but she couldn't say anything. She was making sounds, not words.

"Ma-a-a! Ma-a-a!" she said.

"No, Princess. Mom-my. Mom-my. Watch my lips. Mom-my," I said to her.

"Ah-ah," she said.

I could see it in her eyes. She wanted so badly to say my name, but she couldn't. She just couldn't. I reached my arms out to pull her into a hug so I could comfort her.

"Pillow fight!"

I screamed as Natty smacked me over the head with her pillow.

"Natty, you're dead!" I said, grabbing one of my pillows and chasing her out of my room.