sim.jaeyun → reality show

24

I sat on the edge of my bed, just tracing my fingers through Yeong's fur as he turned onto his back.

Man, at least this little guy was cute.

I was left alone for a good while, and it was a very much needed while.

My head was clouded with several thoughts, I had to drop weight in two days, I had to film that stupid show, Jake was in this house and seemed to hate me - which confused me ultimately because he was literally acting so friendly with me a good while back.

I guess it's like he said, this is all for the show.

Defeated, I gave another sigh, I could hear the laughter and the chatter outside of my door. It somehow made me feel even worse.

I sat up from my bed, heading towards my balcony and sliding the patio door open. It was dark and cold outside, but I feel like that's just what I needed to get back to my old self - the Haerin that didn't care about any comments, or my manager's comments about my weight.

Or even something a guy, who I thought was nice, had to say.

I heaved another large sigh, just staring out into the night sky. All I had to do, was just simply last a few more weeks in this shitty hellhole, and then I can get back on track with my actual idol life.

The one without all the scandals every episode, or the one without sharing a mansion with a group. You know, the regular idol life.

"Can we talk?" A voice from behind me caused me to jump, I didn't even hear anybody enter. I turned around, not looking at his face and just turning back to face the scenery.

Despite my hell of a reply, he stood beside me, looking out into the sky too.

"I didn't mean to shout at you like that, I don't know what overcame me." Jake suddenly apologised, his voice carrying the same warmth and softness as usual.

I looked up at him, and he looked down at me. A brief moment of eye contact, until I broke it and continued staring at the sky, my heart pounding against my chest.

"Maybe I was jealous, I don't know. I just was in a shitty mood from everybody jumping on me straight in the morning. I shouldn't of taken it out on you." Jake stared into the sky, and I looked over at him, a small smile crossing my lips.

"It's okay." I managed to say in a very quiet voice.

"It's not, you know how shitty I feel now? And with the reprimanding from Mingho - not to be intrusive or anything - but did that fucker slap you too?" Jake looked over at me in utter horror and disgust.

I just shrugged, giving a large sigh.

"It is what it is." I simply told him, there was really no way of stopping Mingho. The only way would probably be to kick him out of the entertainment, but that would mean BLOOM would cease to exist.

"Haerin, that's fucked up, managers shouldn't be doing shit like that, and the weight thing too? That's fucking insane too-"

"Jake. You and I live different lives." I turned to look at him, he gazed into my eyes, listening intently while still in disbelief, "I don't know if you've noticed, but people in the media are against me. For interacting with you, they hate me, for interacting with Jinhyeong, they hate me, for even being in this group - or matter of fact - for even being alive. I'm arguably the most hated on the platform right now." I gave a bitter chuckle.

"Imagine if I gain weight massively too, imagine if people notice visible weight gain. How do you think that will impact me? Knowing that I'm already getting grilled on every platform ever, take a think." I tried to get it in his head as softly as possible.

He gave large exhale, evidently frustrated but unable to even do anything about it.

"Goddamn it, people are fucking crazy." He muttered under his breath, running his fingers through his hair, "Can I not help you? I'll put out a statement or something, anything Haerin."

I gave a light smile, followed by a gentle chuckle as I looked up at him again.

"It's okay. I'll be fine." I told him, but clearly his eyes knew I was lying.

He spontaneously pulled me into a hug, wrapping his arms around my head as he pulled me into his chest. He rubbed my head lightly, it took me by surprise initially, but I quickly grew accustomed to this warm feeling.

"I'm sorry Haerin, so sorry." Jake apologised, his voice was one of sincerity and guilt. I gave a smile as he continued to just hold me in his arms.

After a quite comfortable minute, he let go of me, staring into my eyes.

"I won't let anybody hurt you." He told me, and his words seemed serious.