𝗙𝗢𝗥𝗖𝗘𝗗 𝘵𝘶𝘳𝘯𝘴 𝘪𝘯𝘵𝘰 𝑳𝑶𝑽𝑬 𝘮𝘢𝘳𝘳𝘪𝘢𝘨𝘦

✧𝘾𝙝𝙖𝙥𝙩𝙚𝙧: 3 "𝘛𝘩𝘦 𝘵𝘳𝘢𝘶𝘮𝘢"✧

He passed cookie (my cat) to my sister's hand from his hand. I watched how his eyes were fixed on my pet. My sister went inside with him then there fell an unknown silence which neither of us had intended to break and nor were we uncomfortable by that.
After a few mins his mother came to us stating that "c'mon we're going home"
Both of us stood up as if we were waiting to get departed from each other but let's be honest i kinda liked it, sitting with him alone because it kept me away with my family and their words, their voice to sum up, their everything

All of us reached our main door when they headed towards their car to leave right at that moment his mother came to me to say goodbye and there she passed me some money and said "here have it for, buy a good ring for you my dear"

I was shook.
Because it's a culture where I live that if a woman comes to you and does this it means that you're getting engaged. To her son. And your family has also agreed. And you'll be getting married to him in few months.

All of them left and everyone gathered in the living room to talk about them and how happy they were but i went straight back to my room.

IT HIT ME. ALL OF IT.
Leaving hashir, getting bashed and getting shame from my own family, my family forced me to get married with an abusive cold @ss rude @ss guy without asking whether I wanted it or not. It's exhausting and suffocating now. "Help i can't breathe now" i sighed.

Zayn's POV
My mother came to me to get me from that balcony and "oh I've to be with them again in that damn car and this damn whole family" my brain sighs. I don't know what's going on in her head but i just hope she isn't wishing to get loved by me because I'll never be able to, she seems like a good person or I really don't know I'm bad at guessing people's true face, i hope she'll get married to someone who's capable of loving her. I stood up hastly and noticed, so did she. I didn't get us but it's okay it's not like i want it anyways.

"C'mon we're going home" said my mother so all of us went to the main door and started to sit in the cat and then i saw my mother giving a hassle of notes to ahila.

My eyes were shook and all wide.

This is the moment I realised she's really going to force me to get married. After that she sat in the car and the driver started driving the car.
All of them are talking about how lucky they'll be that they're getting this good daughter in law and how beautiful she was.
I'm feeling extremely uncomfortable with these people now that i wanna jump outside the car, I'm having trouble breathing now.

I made an excuse that I have to be in my office because it's urgent as soon as we reach the door. I drove the car like a maniac and reached my office there i sat with my mind all blank and my eyes still widened, all shocked.

I don't even want to hear my mother's voice now, i know I love her and respect but I'm getting confused now "does she really love me?" "Am i really her son?" "How can she do this to her own son, how she cannot care about my happiness?" I put both of my hands on the back of my head and i really wanted to scream but I didn't instead some tears came rolling down my cheek.

The haunting memories. The memories why I don't want to get married or even get in a relationship. They're scaring.
My brain is playing all those memories clearly without asking for my consent
It happened when i was around 14-15, there was a party in my house in which, one of my father's best friends came with his 19 year old daughter and i knew her since childhood because both of the friends were close like brothers. As usual I was talking with her, she was like an older sister. She was asking about studies school and so did i about her college but suddenly she called me to an empty room, with a confused mind i went inside with her and she locked it while pushing me on the bed in which I fell. She stripped. Without wasting a second she was all naked and my eyes almost burst in shock, with disgust in my mind i closed my eyes but she held my hand and forced me to look at her while saying "will you date me, look I'm all pretty".
After this my mind couldn't replay the memory further as i would rather die than getting it recalled and broke down just after remembering all this.
I'm disgusted about the idea of getting in a relationship since then. I cried the whole evening till night until i couldn't.
Then i reached my home where i saw my mother welcoming me home with the biggest smile ever it only made me annoyed, she has never ever welcomed me like this before.

"Come to the dining table in the main house after shower , i cooked something special for you"

"I'm not hungry" i replied and went straight to my room. I removed the coat, loosed my tie and layed on the bed like a de@d body while starting on the ceiling.
"I can't do this anymore" echoed my brain

𝘼/𝙉

♡𝙏𝙝𝙖𝙣𝙠 𝙮𝙤𝙪 𝙛𝙤𝙧 𝙧𝙚𝙖𝙙𝙞𝙣𝙜 ♡

𝙥𝙡𝙚𝙖𝙨𝙚 𝙫𝙤𝙩𝙚!! 𝙖𝙣𝙙 𝙨𝙝𝙖𝙧𝙚. 𝙉𝙚𝙬
𝙘𝙝𝙖𝙥𝙩𝙚𝙧 𝙬𝙞𝙡𝙡 𝙗𝙚 𝙪𝙥𝙙𝙖𝙩𝙚𝙙 𝙨𝙤𝙤𝙣!!