An Assortment of Dissonant Thoughts

{ Can You Drown in Ice? }

Word Count: 1013

Lucy bundled her arms more tightly around herself as she waited by the car door. She could hear Adam attempting to squeeze her suitcase into the already-packed trunk and sighed, letting out a puff of air that rode away on the frigid wind.

"Adam, please, I can call a taxi," Lucy called, a somewhat annoyed note in her voice as her teeth chattered from the cold.

"No! No, I'm going to drive you, and it's going to be just fine." With one last shove, Adam heaved the trunk closed in triumph and hopped into the driver's seat, starting the engine. His 2010 Honda Accord rumbled happily to life. Its windshield was already plated with ice from the previous night's below-zero temperatures. Lucy sat down in the passenger seat, slamming the door shut behind her and rubbing her hands together as the heat boosted on, breezing her face with a comfortable gust of air that promised her limbs would soon thaw.

Adam snatched the ice scraper from the floor of the backseat, then stepped back out and quickly started to scratch away the frost with so much energy that it was as though he were scratching off lucky numbers on a lottery ticket. Lucy shut her eyes and shook her head, tired and exasperated from the day's events. She only opened them again when she heard the driver's side door open and close, and suddenly they were off.

Lucy stared pointedly out the window, looking past the frosted edges out into the windswept winter wonderland beyond. She could see Adam glancing at her in her periphery, but couldn't muster the energy to say anything. Just when she thought the tense silence would consume her, Adam reached for the radio and turned the dial, flicking to a station playing classic rock songs. His fingers tapped incessantly on the wheel as they finally pulled out onto the highway.

Clearing his throat, Adam said, "So, did you go through the checklist? Do you have everything?" His tone was casual, but Lucy knew he was secretly hoping she'd forgotten something back in their old bedroom. Then they'd have to turn around, and she would see their house and start sobbing and wonder why she ever left him, and they'd kiss and shred the signed papers burning a hole in their kitchen junk drawer, waiting to be mailed. But she knew she wouldn't change her mind.

"Yes, I have everything." She reached for the volume dial and turned it so the singer's gravelly lyrics and the accompanying screechy guitar chords were somewhat muted. "You know you can mail me things, if you find something I left. But I didn't."

Ignoring this last comment, Adam leaned forward, spinning the dial so the song was back to its previous volume. He decided to join in with the singer, his pitchy voice that had once captured all of Lucy's attention and thoughts–why had she ever liked his singing to begin with?–now making her even more frustrated. She pressed the button to turn off the radio entirely, earning a disgruntled "Hey!" from Adam, but she didn't care.

Out of nowhere, the car gave an odd lurch. Lucy's head whipped around to Adam, who was watching the speedometer with concern. Her eyes followed his gaze to see the needle steadily dragging downward–65, 54, 39...

"Oh, damn it!" Adam said, switching on the hazards and beginning to glide over to the empty emergency lane. The car lurched even more, throwing them forward against their seatbelts, then chucking them back into the seats. Eventually, Adam steered it into position and switched the emergency brake on. Lucy glared at him, then tried to arrange her face into one that looked less accusatory. "Adam, when was the last time you got this car checked out?"

Adam rubbed the back of his neck, jabbing hopelessly at the dashboard, but the lights had flickered off. Before he could respond, they were startled by the sound of the engine sputtering out, leaving only the whooshing of fully functioning cars passing beside them.

"Oh, my god!" Lucy cried, exasperated. "My flight leaves in forty minutes! Those were the only tickets for the next two days because of the snowstorms coming in!"

"Hey, hey, it's fine," Adam replied, trying to calm her down, while his own face was riddled with panic. He had since abandoned prodding the dashboard for some semblance of life still in the car. "We'll go back. You can stay until you get another flight. It'll be okay."

Lucy bitterly replied, "I'm not going back, Adam! I can't go back! I don't want to spend another minute there, or with you!"

The moment she'd said it, Lucy wished she could take it back. She froze, her breath hitched in her chest, blinking back tears of anger and regret. Adam stopped too, a look of surprised hurt on his face, then pulled his phone out of his pocket, speaking with a voice much quieter than before. "I'll go take a look under the hood and call AAA."

Lucy nodded. He shut the door behind him, seemingly not careful about how loud he slammed it anymore. The icy-edged view she had of him out the windshield was quickly obscured by the hood, so she stared instead at the floor, rubbing her red nose and sniffing.

It had definitely jarred him, her admitting the truth about how she felt. Again she wished she'd kept her temper more even. The day had been a long one, and she just wanted to be in Philadelphia with her sister, away from here. Away from the happy, hopeful memories turned sour that made her feel like she'd aged 45 years in only 3.

Shaking her head, Lucy reached up and turned the radio back on. She messed with the dial until a station playing indie pop filled her ears. With one quick twist, Lucy turned the volume up enough to block out the sound of the highway and her own speeding thoughts before they could steal her away.

Enough to block it out before she drowned.