Chapter 5 - Desire

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Radhika

I stayed in Kitchen where in Sita ma goes out to serve breakfast to him. I lost myself in thoughts, how my life changed drastically. An unknown tears dwells in my eyes making my vision blur. I wipe it and gets shocked while turn, only to find him there...standing behind me. I am snapping my eyes continuously to comfort myself, but before i do, he grabs my hand and drags me to the dining hall and makes me sit beside him on the table and said, "From now on, you should have breakfast and dinner with me. No excuses".

I am just blinking at him of not knowing how to react and i get jerk listening him said little loudly, "I need a response if i say something , SENORITA". I gulped seeing him starring me and just nod my head in acceptance. I felt very odd listening the word as Senorita...i don't feel like he is calling ME. I look at my plate and started having my food but unknowingly i opened my mouth and said, "Radhika is my Name".

I could sense that i am getting a glare from him, but i did not lift my eyes and concentrates on my food but wheeze listening him, "But i love Senorita . So from today, you practice this name and respond to me when i am calling you or talking to you. Got it?".

Sita ma who stands beside him chuckles seeing me blinking having my wide opened eyes, he looks at her and said, "Am i joking anything?"

She nods her head negatively and looks at me, i turn down my eyes to the plate and having it silently. He finishes his food and informs her, "There is a party tonight and i will come home late. You stay here tonight and make sure that she is not going to step out after this door"

I am in a verge of crying and stares with tears in my eyes, i speak to myself, "I hate him....i just hate him now"

I left the food in between and rushes inside the kitchen without even looking at both but i felt a strong gaze on my back. I heard their talk in a low voice when i am wiping my tears, i make myself calm down and concentrates on their talk but i could hear only the last word he told her, "Being here is safe for her and that's final".

What the hell? Who is he to decide this? Am i safe here? Even he has eye on me then how can he said that i am safe here. My mind provoking me against him but my heart supports him and fight against with my mind. I see, Sita ma is coming towards the kitchen, i quickly composed myself and shows her my back. She comes to me and before she said anything, i hastily said, "I heard"

"What you heard?" she asked me back.

"I am not allowed to step out from this house and he told that it is safe for me staying here" i completed in one go and turns my face to other side.

She understands my feelings well, she rubs my head and said, "There should be some reason for his saying. If he said so, then it is 100% true that you are safe here than outside"

I seriously don't know what magic he did on her that she is supporting and trusting him blindly. Does she even know what he is expecting from me? Definitely not. How can she trusts him blindly and not opposing him. I did not say anything but i run to my room and locked the door.

I want to cry...cry loudly to pour all my pains out. I feel like something is burdening me inside of not showing any emotions, i am feeling so depressed, i want to feel my mom's warmth. But how come it's possible.  Tears pouring on my cheeks and there is no way to stop it...I can't see her anymore. The only person who loved me unconditionally... My only relation in this world.  Maa,  why you left me alone in this cruel world. I cried my heart out and keep on crying remembering about my roller coaster life.

After few hours, i felt my eyes are heavy and i slowly opened to find myself sleeping on the bed after thinking a lot about my fate. I look at the timing and it shows 3:00 PM noon. Oh god, how could i sleep like this..this much time? I immediately get up and refresh myself to go down. I meet Sita Ma in the hall having her palm on her cheeks and bows her head down and she looks upset.

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