Women like you turn winds to entire storms, and yet they ask, am I enough? ~ Ventum.
Elham.
الحام.
What's the worse that could happen? I asked myself as I clutched my hands to the straps of my backpack tightly. This wasn't going to be easy but it was going to be fine. Imaan and I had just finished having some cereal. She had slept over at my place the night before, after going to grab the clothes she'd need for today. I was currently standing weirdly outside my door, facing the street. Apparently, she had forgotten to grab a couple of things, so she quickly went to get them while I stood there, waiting, nervous, almost tremulous.
What's the worse that could happen? I asked myself again.
"Hey, relax okay?" Her voice seemed back to reality.
I took a deep breath and nodded.
I walked down and stopped beside her before we began to walk. This was our tradition. We always had the option of getting a ride to school but Imaan always said this helped burned our 'calories' and as for me, it helped to warm up my body, especially my brain. It made me think faster and burn out negative energy.
Walks to school were usually quieter than our walks home. We passed a group of guys who were most probably headed to the same destination as us. They all shared a look before turning back to look at me. I shook my head.
"Elham" she came to a halt.
I turned to her. I was wearing my glasses today but I still couldn't see. My eyes were teary. I was scared.
"You'll be fine okay. I'm here with you"
I forced a smile. And then she took my hands in hers as we made our way.
My heart was pounding, knees weak, palms sweaty as we reached the school gates. How was I going to face them all, and worst of all, Asaad. I did not want to see him or have him anywhere close.
As we entered, everyone's eyes were on us, me to be precise. As predicted.
As we made our way through the hallway, some would laugh, some would murmur, some would stare, and some actually didn't care at all, they minded their businesses.
I stopped by my locker. As I opened it, a black envelope flew to the floor.
I looked around and I picked it up. It had to be mine. There was a little 'Y' written in white, by a corner.
Yasmeen.
I shook my head and dropped it back into the locker, in between the pages of a notebook. I grabbed everything I needed. I didn't have first period so I was gonna go to the library. Imaan didn't either, but she said she had to go handle a couple of things promising me she was gonna be back as soon as possible. My head hung low as I passed the crowds and made my way to the library. This was easier than I thought. All I had to do was avoid contact with anyone and ignore all the gibberish remarks and reactions.
I found an empty sit and took it. There were a couple of people in the library but none seemed bothered by my presence. I thanked God silently, as I took my seat.
The librarian, a petite brunette had given me a look on my way in.
I wondered how many people knew about it. And just maybe, she knew nothing. Maybe it was just from my psyche. I just naturally assumed anybody looking at me, knew me.
