Out of Reach

Chapter Fourteen

ꕤ Amber ꕤ

When I got up to my room, Jacq was putting her shoes on. I desperately began wiping my tear-stained cheeks, attempting to hide my current state from her. 

"Woah, what the hell happened to you?" She asked, looking down at the vast coffee stain running down the front of my body.

"Ugh, it's nothing." I brushed it off, not wanting to explain.

"Amber, it's clearly something. You're crying."

"I'm fine," I said, taking off my shoes and picking out a change of clothes.

"Are you and Tom fighting?"

"What? No." I said, turning back around at her, "I was with Cassidy."

I peeled off the sticky coffee-stained shirt and changed into clean clothes.

"Oh," Jacq's voice lingered, trailing as she processed this information, continuing to tie her shoes.

"What?" I snarled, my unexpected tone catching Jacq off guard.

Her eyes shot over in awe as I questioned her. She was judging me, and honestly, at this moment, I didn't have it.

"Nothing," Jacq shrugged, "how you spend your time is none of my business." Her voice was trailing off as the sentence went on.

"Isn't it, though?" I jabbed.

Jacq stood up, hastily making her way over to me. In the past, I have always admired Jacq's ability for confrontation, and even at times thought it to be brave or empowering, but at this moment, when it was directed towards me, it terrified me.

"What is that supposed to mean?" Her eyes widened as she stepped closer.

Part of me wanted to tell her to forget it and move on. I hesitated. My palms began sweating as she stood there in front of me, staring.

Suddenly the words began rabidly bubbling from my mouth as if I had no control over what I was about to say.

 "If you truly felt that way, then why did you tell Tom that I was late to homecoming because I was with Cassidy?"

Jacq stood there, tilting her head, acting like she was trying to rack her brain as to what I was referring to.

I continued, "You had no right telling him that."

"What was I supposed to do, Amber? Lie? He asked me where you were, and I told him. Big deal."

"It is a big deal." The volume of my voice escalated as I continued, "Especially because you have no idea what you're talking about!"

Jacq rolled her eyes, "Well, then, tell me!"

The adrenaline pumped through my veins, my heart beating against my ribs, everything in me felt like I was about to explode from the inside out. All I could think about was how desperately I wanted to tell her. I wanted to tell her everything, but I can't. 

Jacq scoffed, "You've changed, Amber. I feel like I have barely seen you recently. You're either working, or with Tom, or now I guess with Cassidy!"

"That's not fair," I gulped, stopping myself from getting choked up, "you know I have a lot going on right now with school, work, my family..."

Jacq shook her head, walking back to her bed, "You know what? Forget it." She picked up her bag and coat and pushed past me, our shoulders colliding.

Jacq opened the door, stopping in the middle of the doorway, and muttered, "Let me know when the old Amber is back, the one I met on move-in day."

And with that, and without turning around, she closed the door behind her and left me there. Alone.