The Greatest Prank

Ch 14

The Order of the Phoenix. A secret club for people who actually believed the crap that came out of Dumbledore's mouth. Or in the case of one Sirius Black, it was either join or have to deal with Death Eaters trying to recruit you whether you wanted in or not.

Harry and 'Loki' were not impressed. They had been having a decent summer in their respective guilds (with Loki converting Harry to the fun of blowing things up and setting people you don't like on fire, and teaching the other boy how to 'fwoosh' without a wand...which meant the Ministry couldn't track it) when Dumbledore somehow managed to drag them to an old house that had only recently started to be cleaned.

Needless to say they weren't happy about the fact, and Sirius had a rather amusing look on his face when Harry started talking specifics on how badly they were going to sue the Ministry for the fact he had been in jail for twelve years without even a trial.

And then there was Hermione, who was beyond upset finding out how Loki ended up where he was.

Apparently the fact he was a T.A. that confiscated her time turner only for it to be wreaked by Draco made her furious.

Of course Loki did not mention he fully planned to replace it with some spares the guild had lying around.

Though he had to admit, cornering Snape in an unused room and then setting him on fire was particularly enjoyable. Especially when the greasy-haired bastard spilled where he could find Voldemort.

Snape didn't know who this Loki boy was or why he looked like a younger Potter brat...but he did know that it was a very stupid idea to withhold information from someone who was not only part of the Guild of Darkness but had no hesitation whatsoever in melting faces off and setting you on fire with a smile on their face.

That being said, Sirius surprised him by letting the boy raid the Black family library for protecting his pup. Though he was confused as to why Loki mostly swiped any books on healing and countercurses.

On the plus side, because he rarely bothered with the really dark stuff, the Order didn't think to take the books from him. After all, what harm could there be from learning how to heal?

Of course had they know Loki often went into in-depth discussions on dark magic with Sirius' mother in her painting, they would have been far more worried.

Walpurga was just pleased that her disappointing son's heir happened to be suitably dark, even if he was a half-blood. She even directed him to the more useful books, so long as he made sure that Dumbledore never got his hands on them. Odds were he would destroy them if he did, or they would vanish into his personal library.

Considering it was either give the books to a half-blood that might actually make some use out of them and restore the glory of the Black family name, or allow the extreme pacifist to abscond with them, there wasn't much of a choice.

At the very least, she quit screaming nearly as much with Loki around.

"So let me get this straight. We're going to attack Malfoy Manor, set any Death Eaters and Voldemort on fire...and then when we capture any survivors we're making them doing paperwork in triplicate?"

"All while you serve papers forcing them to pay extreme fines for not being part of the guild and bringing down the name of Dark Lords everywhere. There's a reason why the Guild of Lawyers is associated with the Guild of Darkness. We don't like scabs, and unlike the League of Heroes we make sure they learn to either join the union or pay the price," said Loki flatly.

Harry shivered. He had seen the Wall of Scabs, which was held what was left of said fools in the Guild of Darkness while visiting Loki.

He was mostly waiting for someone from the affiliate Union of Multiverse Trolls to show up and bring him home. No point wasting his time when he could have someone who knew what they were doing drop him off.