Rookie Mistakes: A Station 19 FanFiction

Chapter 3: Empathy is Hard: Part Two

   "Captain Herrera?" I ask as soon as I spot Herrera, out-of-breath from tracking her down. "I'm not Captain today. Jack is," she replies quickly and walks away towards the beanery. "Okay?" I whisper to myself feeling helpless and a little frustrated. Knowing I did not see Gibson in the beanery this morning when looking for Herrera, I turn to get ready to jog upstairs to search for him. "Captain!" I say when I spot him coming out of the Captain's office upstairs. I wave my hands to get him to stop and wait for me to finish climbing the stairs. Breathing hard, I ask, "Has anyone heard about that kid Jacob and how his family is doing that we helped a few days ago?"

     "Ummm..." he starts to think as Hughes walks towards us, obviously listening to our conversation and informs us on the subject. "Mr. Herrera and Miller were talking yesterday and said his mom is still in the hospital, but she's on life support. They don't think she'll make it......but, Jacob is doing fine. He is with his dad I think is what they said," she says sincerely, knowing how touchy the subject is for me. Slowing my breathing, looking at the wall painting right above Vic and Jack's heads, I analyze it for a moment to try and stop from tearing up. I don't want my new co-workers to think I can't handle this job. They might make me go to therapy or something for my past. Thinking about my past therapy, I realized even before I went for the first time that it was NOT for me. Let's just say I was right about that.

     Not wanting to think about my past or the therapy, I respond to Hughes with both her and Jack staring at me, waiting, "Oh man, that sucks." "Yeah, but at least the kid is doing good," Jack says and starts toward the beanery to join the others for breakfast. Hughes stays for a moment until Jack is out of hearing range and adds, "Look. I don't know all about your past, but if you ever need to talk, me and Montgomery are always here. It is our job to help people after all, and I don't know how you feel about therapy but there are group therapy sessions every week. It's specifically made for firefighters," she adds. I give a little giggle and say, "Thanks, but therapy is not my thing. Well, should we join the others?" I enunciate the "not" in my statement. "Yep, let's go. I'm starving," she says with a growl in her voice as we head towards our breakfast.

                                                                                 —————

     Watching everyone converse with one another around the big table, eating breakfast, questions form in my mind about Jacob. I don't know why I cannot stop thinking about him. "Stop overthinking this," I think to myself as I try to focus on the current conversations going on around me.

     I take a swig of pure black coffee and analyze my Christmas mug with it being the middle of August, as I listen to the sound waves around me. Deciding which conversation to get involved in, I choose the one going on right in front of me. "No way," Herrera says, who is sitting right in front of me, shocked as her mouth drops wide open, facing Maya, "You and him?" She points to Bishop, who is smiling, and Gibson, who is giving Maya the what have we gotten ourselves into look. "For how long?" She firmly asks as Bishop quickly and quietly replies, "Only a few months," she looks at Jack who is sitting right next to her. Jack throws his hands up, pretending like he has nothing to do with this. With Herrera's loud mouth, everyone has stopped their conversions to listen in on this interesting one. Everyone sits awkwardly for a moment before Miller walks up behind Jack, placing both hands on either side of his shoulders, and says, "Congrats man, it's about time you tell everyone, so, now you can stop sneaking around my house." Jack looks up at Miller. "Miller, you knew?" Herrera replies with clear surprise in her voice. Hughes, sitting next to me, leans over and puts a hand over my ear, whispering, "One of the perks of being in this family: the hot drama." We both look at each other and laugh. "What's so funny about this?" Herrera looks at both of us with a pissed-off face. She forgets us as we both go silent, and look at our breakfast in front of us as Vic replies, "nothing." Bacon, sausage, eggs, biscuits with jelly: the best breakfast I've had in a long time, maybe even since my mom....... "I just think it's kind of mean how Miller knew before me, Maya, that you, my best friend, is with Jack, my EX," she whines and says the word "ex" loudly. Everyone stares at Andy for a moment before "breakfast" is interrupted with a "Beep! Beep! Station 19. Apartment fire. Address: 27392 South Hamburg Street," repetition. Hughes waves at the crew, "Have fun." Jack then shouts, "Hughes, Miller, and I are on rig one, ladder, and Herrera, Warren, Young on rig two, Bishop and Montgomery on aid car for the shift. Let's go!" "What?" I hear a disappointed Vic reply softly as we all rush to gear up.