Luminaria

Chapter 2

Princess

It is often said that after death, one is bound to either ascend to heaven or descend to hell. The deeds, both good and sinful, committed during one's lifetime are thought to determine their rightful place in the afterlife.

At sa katayuan ko'y hindi na bago ang matawag na makasalanan. I am consistently labeled as the bratty troublemaker within any group, often referred to be disrespectful and profane—but sometimes worse than those.  I always demand precision and perfection in my viewpoint or else you'll encounter the worst of me. Therefore, after my death I prepared myself the hell they always say I belong.

I expected it to be a burning place, like a sea of lavas or overflowing fire burning a sinner's soul without dying. Chaotic and painful screams, wishing to be forgiven or to simply end the misery of an inferno's blaze. Walang kapatawaran, isang parusang hindi na mababali pa, where everyone in hell would just wish to be killed but the thing is... death isn't after you anymore. Pain, agony, and regret is what you are bound to feel.

Minarka ko ang paniniwalang 'yon sa aking isipan, because everyone viewed me to end up that way and slowly I accepted those in myself like a written and tattooed destiny for me.

But just in a snap, my beliefs seemed to broke like a fallen glass.

I died. I lost so much blood, and didn't have the chance to apply any medication. I fell from a cliff with the criminal. And the moon was the last thing I saw until waves crashed me, it consumed my body, darkness swallowed me. I died in the ocean.

Those memories flowed in my mind like an endless falls. Patuloy ang pag-agos nito. Lilim ng aking pag-iisip ay ang walang tigil kong pagdama sa paligid, at kahit ilang beses kong itanggi ay takot akong tuluyang imulat ang mata at masunog ng walang katapusan... ng walang kamatayan.

I shook my head and coldness was the only thing I could feel, far from my imaginations.

Is this the hell? Kabaliktaran ba nito ang pinaniniwalaan ng lahat?

I'm literally shaking abnormally and suddenly have the urge to open my eyes to feel the burning hell they say cause I'm shivering to death... Oh! I'm dead na pala!

Shit?! I'm dead... Nakaramdam ako ng takot sa sarili. I-im ghost now?

Dulot ng mga iniisip ay mabilis kong inangat ang talukap ng aking mga mata. Kadiliman. Hanggang kailan ko nga ba ito haharapin at pilit na lalabanan. Even in this unknown place I was welcome by the darkness.

Where is it? Where is the burning hell I am supposed to end up?

Bakit lamig ang bumabalot sa aking katawan? Where are the chaotic screams? Why is this place covered by ear flitting silence. Is it the opposite? Sa nanghihinang lagay ay pinakiramdaman ko ang paligid. I am lying on a cold dark room, with a heavy thing stopping me to move. I adjusted my eyes from the darkness and narrowed my gaze to my body heaved by... Chains.

Am I imprisoned?!

Binaliktad ba ako sa criminal kaya ako ang nakakulong ngayon? For goodness sake! The girl I saved should be a fucking witness!

I couldn't state my thoughts because my dry lips, and throat, numb and stingy tongue seemed to be paralyzed. I didn't move a flinch, I feel so weak that even a slight nod of my head is killing my system.

Nanatiling nanlalaki ang aking mata dahil sa namumuong konklusyon at 'di makontrol na emosyon sa aking kalooblooban. Mabigat ang bawat hiningang binibitawan ko pilit na binabalik ang aking lakas.

I'm alive. The coldness of this room made me want to feel the heat from hell for a moment.

I didn't know how long I've been deeply thinking, but the thing in my mind thinks only one conclusion.