Summer of Us

Chapter 13

When I finally let Star see the mirror, she lets out a gasp. Her freshly manicured hand darts over her opened mouth, which are over-lined and plump with fresh gloss. Her filled-in eyebrows shoot up in surprise, taking in my handiwork—the colorful smoky eye, the flawless skin, the highlighted and blushed cheeks. Peacock earrings hang from her ears, and though I haven't even touched her hair yet, she looks like a supermodel.

"Oh my god," she says, light eyes round and framed beautifully. "Aves, I have no words." She drops the mirror on her cluttered vanity and pulls me in at the waist to a back-breaking hug. "Thank you."

"You're welcome, mama," I say, smoothing down out the pieces of her ponytail that had fallen out of the elastic.

"I love it when you come to town," she says, letting go so she can admire her reflection once more. "I wish you were here for every one of my date nights."

I smile, and then go to plug in her curling iron. Her room is a mess of scattered clothes, the aftermath of our closet tour to find something cute to wear for tonight. It's her and Trent's two month anniversary, and he's taking her for Italian and a show in the city—some travelling Broadway company that she's obsessed with performing the Cats musical. She'd been mad excited when she told me about it a few weeks prior, and I'd offered to do her up the way I used to for school dances.

"You're so naturally beautiful," I say, standing behind her and taking her in. "I'm jell."

"Oh, shut up," she says, taking her hair down and setting her mirror back so she can watch the process. Outside in the hall, her brother is yelling about ordering pizza to another one of her siblings. Prior to her makeover, I had sat down her four siblings in the living room while she was in the shower and demanded they left her the hell alone this afternoon. It's her day, and she doesn't need any fighting or chores distracting her from it. "Says the most natural beauty of us all. I swear it's like you got hotter while you were away. Everyone stops and stares at you now."

I laugh, checking the heat on the hot tool. It's the funniest and most inaccurate thing she's ever said to me.

"It's all kind of sad, isn't it?" she says, her mood changing suddenly. When she goes to pick at the freshly applied nail polish, I slap her hand away. "You'll be off to Savannah soon, Trent's leaving next week." Star pouts at her reflection. "Summer went by way too fast. I was working so much I didn't even get a tan."

"Well for one, skin cancer is overrated," I say, sectioning off her hair. "And it'll be ok. At least we'll come back for breaks. When you think about it, Thanksgiving is right around the corner."

But her smile is still sad. "It just sucks. Like, I'm happy for you guys. But it stinks to watch you leave. You guys have these whole separate lives now, and I feel like I'm just stuck where I've always been."

I felt for her. Staying in a hometown, especially a boring one like this, blew chunks just coming back for breaks. I couldn't imagine still living here year round, hanging out with the same people I've always known and getting excited whenever a new restaurant opens on the main strip in town.

"You can visit me anytime," I promise, curling a piece of her multicolored hair. She still has some pink leftover from her last dye job. "I'll bring you to all the cool places, and we can get drunk on the river front. Oh! There's this Prohibition Museum that you'd love. My friend works at the stand where they sell tickets. She could totally get us a twenty one and up pass."

"I remember you talking about it," she says, watching her hair fall delicately from the barrel.

"What about you and Trent?" I ask, attempting to keep her engaged. "Are you guys going to try and do the long distance thing?"

"We'll try, but no telling if it'll work out or not," she says. "He gets so busy when he's away, I know how it is. But here's hoping."

"You guys'll be alright," I say confidently, assessing my work so far.

We're quiet, me working through her hair, her watching with a faraway expression. When I'm done, I comb out each of her curls with my fingers, making her more bombshell than porcelain doll. She's beaming by the time I'm done, giving runway models everywhere a run for their money.

"I mean it, Aves," she says, placing a hand over the one I've got on her shoulder. "Thank you."

"Anything for my one true love," I say, kissing her cheek. Exhausted and sweaty, I fall into a starfish position onto her bed.

"I heard Ash and Monty broke up," she says, and my closed eyes shoot open. "You wouldn't have anything to do with that, would you?"

I was going to tell her. That'd been the plan, to tell her the moment I got here. But she'd been so excited about tonight that I let her talk my ear off about musicals and the theater instead. The rules that applied to her siblings tonight were the same ones that I applied for myself—nothing to take away Star's shine today. Absolutely nothing.

"No," I say, propping myself up on my elbows. Downstairs, there's a loud thud, followed by obnoxious laughter. "Monty came over yesterday to tell me about it, though. He said their relationship was toxic."

She watches me, carefully considering her next words. But she doesn't get to say them, because I blurt out about the trip. The invitation, his admitting to being in love with me all that time ago. I even tell her about the goddamn kiss, because I can't stop there. I don't even stop before telling her that I too have feelings for Monty, and that I have pretty much since returning home from school, and that he hasn't left my mind since. I tell her all this in a breathless tangle of words and out-of-sequence events, mirroring how I felt inside—giddy and confused and vile.

"But I'm not sure if I'm gonna go," I go on, because I've already broken the rule about letting Star have today for just herself and Trent. Might as well go all the way. "The moms said it was cool, but they don't know. And I feel guilty, because he just broke up with Ashley, and bad because maybe it's wrong to want him. But god, Star, I want him. I want him bad."

"Aves," she interrupts. "Breathe."

I do as I'm told, one single breath in, one entirely out.

"What about CJ?" she asks, though I haven't mentioned him once, not once. God, he's been gone for two whole seconds and I'm out here acting like a reckless idiot. How could I forget about CJ, funny and cool and sexy CJ? We had texted a little last night, but reception sucked out there and he wanted to enjoy his vacation as much as I wanted to enjoy the rest of mine.

"I don't know," I answer honestly, staring at the collection of costume-like jewelry that's accumulated atop of her dresser. They fill a wooden box with hand-painted flowers. Above, stuck in corners of the mirror, are old photographs, most of her family, two of her and me, one of her and Trent. "We're friends. But do I owe it to him to let him know about all this? It's not like anything is going to happen, anyways. And how will that look? Is it too couple-y to tell him?"

"Dude," she says. "Freaking relax, you're stressing me out."

"Sorry." I groan, tossing myself back on the bed while covering my eyes. "God, I'm stressing myself out."

"Why didn't you tell me?"

"Like in general, or just today?"

"In general, you bitch."

My head snaps up. "Starlyn. You kiss your mother with that mouth?"

"Yes, when my friends are being idiots," she says, standing up. "You know, I'm not entirely for this. You'll be leaving two guys at the end of summer, and I'm not looking forward to seeing Monty crushed. I'm not friends with CJ, but I can imagine it won't be so different."

"Monty knows." Kind of. He doesn't know the extent of me and CJ's relationship, but he has an idea. And CJ knows that I have a crush on Monty. At least, he used to. But he might have forgotten it somewhere between the sheets.

"I don't think anything's gonna happen," I repeat. "It's just a weekend trip. We have to learn to be friends again first. And I don't like the way Monty treated me this summer, so he has to earn my respect back. He can't just waltz in because he broke up with Ashley and take whatever he wants."

Star nods, arms folded. "I agree. But you're delusional if you think nothing's going to happen in that cabin in the woods."