Illusions

2

"You?At this time! Are you okay?",asked Swati. She had just stopped scrolling the dull Fb timeline,and was about to sleep.From the corner of her eyes,she read her wall clock, it was 1:45 am. She never had thought that He would call at this time.

"Yaa! Alright. Just came back home! I wanted to ask where are my shorts? From many days I'm not finding anything. I've been managing my shifts only wearing what I find in front of my eyes. ",Kastur's low voice answered.

"Open your almirah. Top shelf,left side....I used to keep your casual clothes there. Start organising it according to your choice. I'm not your wife anymore Kastur (je sobsomoy tor jamakapor aar jinis kothay thakbe ami bole debo) that I'll have to know and tell you where  your things are!", Swati yawned and waited to hear his reply.

"I never could believe that you are not my wife, (tui to aage astis) you used to come here during our trial once a month. Please do come soon like that. I'm a mess.( Toke chara) Without you I can't find anything. Atleast come once and instruct Bela di.", Swati could hear him opening the almirah.

"It won't work.I've a life,you too. It is odd. Really really odd. In my life ,I've never heard that divorced couple to talk over phone at midnight.", Kastur also realised her smile.

"It was our decision to end it. It were we who got settled soon, and married each other at 23. That was too soon,now I think. I'd not lost you if we were not so young. Are you okay? How are you doing these days?",he added.

" Yes, I'm really .....good, have you eaten anything? ",Swati knew before asking that he had eaten already. She knew him too well.

" You are not here anymore to sit and wait for me. Who will warm the food at this hour of night? So have been taking my dinner outside. Plus ..,...."

"What else? I'm sleepy.",this time Swati could not suppress her yawn.

"Tell me when will you come?",Kastur asked. He was desperate to see her.

"I'll call and inform you. Good night",Swati kept her phone aside and slept.

Swati slept for some hours. Nowadays, her sleep cycle has gotten a bit odd. She keeps thinking about the past at this time.

Swati Dasgupta, had been the only daughter of Ashim and Mekhla Dasgupta.  Ashim and Ajit were two brothers,where the latter had been 5 years older.Ajit and Smita were married and they too had a daughter,Aditi.Just a few years ago Ashim had married Mekhla. It was an arranged marriage. Ashim ,a college professor got very happy when god graced him with a lovely daughter. She had gotten her father's merits and wits. Everything was going great,as Ashim used to drop and pick up his daughter from the school. As his college shift changed, the duty was on Mekhla now.

First few days were usual. Soon Mekhla made friends with mothers of some classmates of Swati. Comparisons of test marks made its path to her little life. A merely 6 year old child did not know any difference of getting neither 2 nor 6 marks out of 10. Children tend to get irritated or afraid soon. They become moody with sudden change of behaviour or attention which they used to get.  It was completely  absurd to physically beat her badly only if she had not answered to her mother's friends nicely,that too infront of them.

Swati had to face the taunts in her school too. Her mother instructed/ tried to convince Swati in making friends with the children of her friends. Swati tried. But the little girl failed. Not all children are blessed with good talks, there are/ will always be some who do fail only in introducing her/himself to others. With time Ashim noticed, his child no more smiled. She made good scores, but her interest in other activities started lacking slowly. He kept quite as he had been more busy in his college, and did not wanted to poke his nose in Mekhla's decisions.

Years later,Ashim's mother Gita once called him as Mekhla came home while beating and taunting Swati the whole way back from School.She was in 5th standard then. When Ashim came, Swati was on verge of going senseless. Ashim noticed the change of Mekhla's demanour as he interveined.

Ashim took his daughter out the next morning. The little girl described how she had complained the teacher about her exam copy and school bag were both destroyed by those kids. Eventually the teacher punished them ,so they got out of the school,and later their mothers who were friends of Mekhla, complained to her about this. Ashim's heart wrenched seeing the marks on her neck and shoulder, where Mekhla had bitten her with hard notebook.

Swati did not know what her father had told her mother, but Mekhla changed. At least for a few days ,Swati thought so. Now the pressure was tripple. A 12 year old was now criticized by her own mother for her behaviour, scores,and looks. Sobbing she used to come to her grandmother asking," Why don't Ma understand that they make fun of me? They tell Ma all the lies? Why does not she believe me? Tell me grandma,am I so bad looking, she had called me ugly yesterday! She now compares with Aditi didi! What should I do if I'm not as good looking as hers? The only thing I can do well are studies. I don't feel like doing any other thing!" Ashim had heard all these while passingby. His insides shattered knowing this.

Going inside his room he had directly asked Mekhla,"Are you really her mother? Do you love her at all? This can't be a way of upbringing!Which mother tells her own child all those bullshit? Beats like animals? Why are you comparing her to others and even Aditi.
She is my daughter only mine,
she is dark- doesn't matter.
She is not a good talker- doesn't matter.
She can't make friends faster- doesn't matter to me......If I get to hear all these ever again, I'll drop you to your parents' place. If I can father her,I can look after her too. I don't want those people near her who don't love her."

Swati started living with her grandma and grand dad passed. Aditi left Kolkata for higher studies.

Swati had slept thinking all this. Her morning alarm woke her up at 8 am. Since her separation, she was back at her father's home. She had made enough money to buy and settle in her own house, but her grandma was in her life's verge. Her father retired. The old,loving man wanted his diamond of a daughter near his eyes. For that Swati had to bear with Mekhla.

" If you had not gotten the divorce, the neighbours and my friends would not be taunting me. You have shattered my image. What was wrong with Kastur? Was he not good? Was he having any affair? Were you having any? Miscarriages happen! Husbands misbehave! Do all the wives leave their husbands? How can you forget how  you have ruined me and your father's equation since your childhood?",Mekhla said standing in the kitchen. Swati was having breakfast. The maids kept looking at the mother-daughter duo. She wiped her tears and gobbled her food.

So many old painful memories flooded her mind.

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