Codename Alpha

Chapter 20

I was the one who ended up keeping watch for a couple hours while Jack and Marine slept. Seeing as we likely wouldn't get any more opportunities, Jack helped me set up the radio to listen and record, albeit quietly, so there was plenty of footage in the scenario that we did make it back to the ship.

As what I assumed to be a late-night news report rambled on, I thought more about the coming events of tomorrow. Deep down, I knew Marine was right. It was childish to think that we could survive the heat, let alone an increasing military search, for a full 24 hours, much less however many days were left before Ibrahimov's rescue shuttle was sent.

My chest got heavy every time I thought about the variables that might be at play in regards to a shuttle in orbit right now. It was also possible that Commander Ibrahimov didn't want to risk sending another shuttle, perhaps thinking we were shot down by an orbital weapons platform or something like that. Although there was the chance that we'd be captured peacefully and not killed tomorrow, there was still no telling what might happen to us afterwards. With this in mind, I turned the volume on the radio down, stopped the camcorder, and began a new recording. I wasn't quite sure how to orient it, deciding to flip it around. It would be easier with a phone or something like that, but putting that thought aside, I began to talk, quietly, trying to make sure I didn't wake Jack or Marine up.

"I don't really know what day it is anymore," I sighed. "Situation logs suddenly feel pointless. Tomorrow, one of two things will happen. We will either be rescued, or be captured and otherwise killed. So... in the event that, sometime in the future, other Valderans visit this planet and find this camcorder and it's footage, well... here I am." I was silent for a couple seconds, trying to figure out something to say. "I'm trying to think of a final goodbye, but I'm having a bit of trouble." A lump in my throat was keeping me from doing just that.

I could see Jack stir awake in my peripheral.

"What are you doing?" he moaned, seemingly still half asleep.

"Writing my will, I guess," I laughed at first, but then realized that was something I should probably do.

"Hm... Well, uh, say goodbye to, y'know, friends, family, all that."

"Right." I took in a deep breath. "Antoni, if you're watching, thanks for putting up with me over the past few weeks. I'm..." I could feel tears brimming my eyes. "God, I can't do this," I said, flipping the camcorder back around and stopping the recording.

Jack got up, walked over to where I was, and sat down. "What's wrong?" He asked.

I found myself struggling to get anything out. There was no point in trying to keep from crying, it was happening and there was nothing I could do to stop it. Jack leaned against me. "I don't want to die," I managed to sputter after briefly composing myself. "This is all too final," I added. I began crying even harder, and started having trouble breathing.

"Well, it's not..." Jack began, stopping there. Instead of continuing, he pulled me closer, and hugged me tightly, so that I had my head on his left shoulder. He didn't say anything, but it was definitely helping me feel better.

I wasn't sure how long I was there for. I lost track of time eventually. His rhythmic breathing was, for some reason, especially calming. At one point, he rested his head on mine, and I figured that he had fallen asleep.

After a while, my crying slowed, and I was able to put actual sentences together. I didn't want to get up, though, as I was comfortable where I was. "Are you awake?" I asked, quietly.

"Mhm," he hummed in return. "We can talk more tomorrow. Try to get some sleep for now."

And that was just what I did.

For once, I actually slept long enough to dream. It wasn't anything too crazy, or pertinent to the situation, mainly centered around a recurring dream I had been having where I'm racing against a cheetah in a decathlon. I had yet to win in any of them.