Amber

Chapter 10

October 14, 2014

Dear Journal,

What's up? How's life treating you? I figure you probably get tired of my endless rants about my boy problems—or—Brad problems, so I wanted to give you a chance to air out any issues you're having. Do you like the drawer I'm keeping you in? It's a little cramped, isn't it? Sorry about that! And you look like you could use a makeover. Settle down ... nothing drastic. But I'm going to buy some new pens. Glitter pens! That will totally make you look hot. You're forbidden from leaving this room though, so you can't hook up with other journals and make journal babies. You're grounded forever. Sorry. Get over yourself.

You're growing on me. Maybe because you are totally working. I feel like I'm so close to actually having a chance with him.

Friends forever?

Today I'm going to smile into you for a change. I have every reason to because Brad asked me for my phone number yesterday!

He was so weird but cute about it. He didn't ask the normal way you would expect a guy to.

"Hey you sexy thang—give me your digits."

Only ... ewww. That would've been bad. But Brad would never do that because he's a gentleman, and he's subtle. Maybe a little too subtle, but that's okay. Even perfect has its downside.

We were talking in the library, and he mentioned how Mrs. Swanson was trying to find more students to help with the food donations. He asked me if I would mind contributing if I could. I said I would, and then he told me to write down my number so that he could give it to her.

Maybe if I didn't have an older sister I would have thought nothing of it. Hannah says it was a clear strategy to ask for my number in a way that wouldn't result in rejection. Of course the very idea that I or anyone could ever reject Brad is insane, but Hannah says that all guys fear rejection because it messes with them psychologically. To them, it's like being less of a man. According to her, anyway. It probably goes back to the days of the cavemen or something.

But he hasn't called yet, so maybe Hannah is wrong. Brad isn't all guys. He's freaking Brad. Normal guy rules don't apply to him.

Hannah can be a little shit sometimes. It's not totally her fault. She's had a lot of experience with guys, so she thinks she's, like, the Encyclopedia of All Things Dating. But she's been wrong before. If she's wrong now, then I'm going to have to murder her because I haven't let my phone leave my sight in two days. I've hit the EFF-you button so many times to ignore other calls it's ridiculous. I keep waking up every hour at night to check if he texted me. Then I'm going to shuffle into the library tomorrow looking like death on no sleep because of this, and Brad will see me and throw away my number anyway.

It's a vicious cycle.

Guys are evil. Pure evil. What is he waiting for? The satellites to be positioned at just the right angle for the perfect reception? Maybe he's over his minutes this month.

Ha! Like I'm going to wait until next month for him to call, clutching my phone in my death-grip and not sleeping all the while in case I actually hear from him.

Yes I am ...

I hate myself.

Updated hit list:

1) Miley Cyrus.

2) Pretty little cheerleader girl.

3) Hailey Austin.