Desirée - Sirius Black

Chapter 4

It's been weeks since the kiss and non of them have brought it up, it was the best kiss of their lives but they were too scared to mention it in case of rejection, it was pretty obvious that they have feelings for each other but there will always be that self doubt until they talk about it, not that they seem to want to do anything about it any time soon, much to Harry's annoyance. He didn't know about the kiss but he knew something happened.

"Sirius, you need to talk to her, what happened with you two you haven't been as close as you used to be, it's been a week since you spoke to her and I want things sorted before I go back to school" Harry was desperate, and he sounded it too because Sirius looked at him in concern.

"It's nothing son, don't worry I'll talk to her soon I'm just preparing myself for the rej- conversation" He nearly said rejection because that's what he's scared of, he likes her a lot.

"What was you really going to say" Harry asked.

"What?" Sirius played dumb.

"You was gonna say something else, you wasn't actually going to say conversation" Harry said.

"Too smart for your own good" he sighed "I kissed her" He confessed.

Harry's eyes bulged out of his head "That's great, so what's the problem" He asked in confusion.

"Well it's not her that's the problem, it me, I haven't been with a women in 15 years, I'm not the man I once was, so there's a sense of self doubt since I met her, yes I flirt with her but I'm not arrogant anymore, I don't know if she actually wants me, like really wants me and I don't have it in me to just hook up" He explained, Harry simply nodded.

"Yeah I'm not buying it, you've never committed before and you're scared, and she's scared you want her but don't want to commit, it's obvious" How the bloody hell is this boy so wise, it wasn't true but if there was some truth to it, it would be wise.

"Harry, that's far from the truth, I want nothing more than to be with her, but I don't know if that what she wants, I mean look at me, I'm a broken man, she deserves someone better, someone who can take her out and spoil her with dates" Sirius said with a sigh, he was a very broken man.

"That's not what I want" a voice said from behind them, they both turned around to find Davina stood there with a frown, and she looked sad.

"I'll go" Harry whispered and walked past Davina kissing her cheek, she smiled at the boy as he did.

She sat in the seat Harry was just in while avoiding Sirius's eyes "Is that what you think of me?" She whispered.

"What?" He asked frowning.

"That I want to be ravished with gifts and dates?" She asked "I really don't know what you want from me Sirius but if you've been avoiding me for that reason then I'll punch you in the face" she said finally looking at him, he could see the sadness in her eyes.

"Well it's a good thing that's not why I've been avoiding you" he chuckled dryly.

"Then why? Because when someone kisses someone like that, you'd expect them to atleast say hi to them when they see them, I didn't even get that, I thought I did something" she whispered. She was so close to hitting him.

"Alright love listen, it wasn't you, I used to be a very different man-" he started but she interrupted him.

"Oh I know, I think you forget I'm friends with your best friend" she chuckled "but I also know that you haven't been with a woman after your escape, that doesn't really scream player to me" she said

"I was a very different man Davina, which also means I'm scared of rejection, during my time at Hogwarts I wasn't rejected, if I wanted to bed a girl they didn't even think twice, they knew of my reputation but it was a game to them, to see who could sleep with Sirius Black and I basked in it, I was never rejected so I don't know the feeling, that makes it all the more terrifying if you where to do it, you're incredibly strong and beautiful, any man would be lucky to have you" As he finished talking she was crying, no one has ever said anything like that about her.