The courting trap

Apprehension

I open the door of my bedchamber, a steaming tub is waiting for me.

"Hey," Estelle smiles "Mrs Taylor will be here shortly."

A stay silent, not moving a muscle.

She makes her way to the door and then suddenly stops in her tracks to turn around and look at me.

My back is facing her and even now she can tell. Walking over to me and gently wrapping her arms around me from behind as she leans her head on mine.

I stay silent only reaching my hands up to grab hold of hers. I blankly keep staring forward as tears stream down my face.

Suddenly it all hits me like a brick and everything starts hurting. I breathe in deeply, like there's not enough oxygen. A sob for an exhale leaves my mouth when I finally breathe out.

I start sobbing so hard I don't breathe in between.

My knees go weak and I drop to the floor, Estelle still clinging onto me. Teardrops fall onto my blue dress and leave dark spots.

I drop my hands off of Estelle's and place them in front of me, now on my hands and knees trying to breathe normally, however I can only breathe in more and more until my lungs can't expand anymore, then a whimper leaves my mouth and it all repeats.

She rubs my back, saying something along the lines of 'You will be alright' and 'I'm so sorry'.

I begin hyperventilating, sitting up and putting my hands in my hair.

Suddenly my face is met with something cold and my mouth drops in shock.

Estelle threw water in my face.

"What did you do that for?" I rub the water out of my eyes.

"I was trying to calm you down."

"By throwing water in my face? From a vase?" I stare at the vase in her hand and the fresh flowers in her other.

"It helped didn't it? She asks, putting her hand on her hip.

It did.

"Here let me help you get up and lets get you a bath." She grabs my arm and pulls me to my feet.

We both turn our heads when we hear a knock at the door, "Come in!" We respond in unison.

The door opens and Mrs Taylor walks in, when sees me she raises her eyebrows. "What happened to your face ma'am?"

"I uh..."

"She was testing the water." Estelle says with a serious face.

I flip my head to her, giving her a quizzical look. What must she think of me?

"Yes." I clear my throat. "Checking if it was warm enough, it was!" I laugh awkwardly.

"Alright." She says in a confused tone.

The next morning I was up earlier then normal. I had woken up before Estelle had even arrived.

I stare at my ceiling. Rubbing my hand over my face.

I must meet him any day now. I really hope it is a match, or one so bad that even my mother does not approve of it.

My door opens slowly, Estelle walks in "Oh you're awake, good morning. Your royal highness." She says with an accent and a dramatic curtsy.

I roll my eyes and sit up. "Didn't sleep so well last night" I form my lips in a line.

"Me neither." She says closing the door and climbing onto my bed next to me. "I heard the news, of the prince."

"Yes, that was what made me upset. What if I don't like him Estelle?"

"You call it off, just like the others."

"I can't she will sell Willow."

She goes silent and her face drowns in sorrow. "I'm so sorry."

"It's alright." I whisper, when we both know it is not.

"You know what, lets put on your prettiest dress and go for a walk."

"Which one?" I have so many pretty ones.

"The white one with the bell sleeves and the little bow ties."

"I love that one."

"It looks amazing on you." She smiles, jumping off my bed and grabbing my arm to pull me out.

After I got dressed up we enter the hallway.

"Want to grab Lucy and Willow?"

Yes. "No I feel like walking today."

"Alright, I will fetch our coats.

I flash a tight-lipped smile and stop in my tracks to wait on her return.

That's when I see Mother on the other side of the hallway, walking towards me.

I look behind me, but there is no one there so she's here for me.

Should I run into my room? Or act like I did not see her?

"Victoria." Her stern voice speaks.

I turn my head back in her direction, when I am met with her daunting eyes I turn mine to the floor.

"He will arrive this afternoon."

"Who will?" I say, knowing exactly who she means but wishing she means someone else.

"Have you forgotten? Prince Nicholas."

"Alright." I try to swallow the lump in my throat. "Though Estelle and I were just leaving so..."

"No you're staying. Go practice piano or do something else productive. You need to present yourself as a good wife to him."

"Yes mother." I murmur, clenching my jaw.

She slowly examines my outfit then walks away without saying a word.

I drop my shoulders, I guess I'll go get Mrs Roggers.