Afraid to love

Chapter 5

We have to move out. I told Nina as much too. If Daniel is responsible for what happened to Lara, then the reason why we need to move is obvious. But if he's not responsible, well, we still need to move. I can't live with him after what I did. How did I ever think sneaking into his room was a good idea? All these thoughts run through my mind during tonight's dance rehearsal. At eight thirty, we're finished. I go to the locker room to change, when I come out Reymond is waiting for me by the door,

"What's up with you tonight? You look absent" he says,

"Just tired" I shrug,

"I was thinking, tomorrow's Sunday, you don't have school, do you?"

"Not tomorrow"

"Do you want to come here in the morning? We can run through some moves together?"

"Sounds like a plan" I say, he beams,

"Great, well, see you tomorrow then? At nine?" I nod, he gives me a hug and leaves.

A couple of minutes later Lara walks out of the locker room and we make our way out of the theatre together. She's telling me how she almost missed rehearsal today. She's scared. I hate that there isn't much I can do to help. We wait together until Elias comes. As he's catching public transport to get here, it takes quite a while for him to come. Once they leave, I head to the bus stop.

The last bus stop is a ten to fifteen-minute walk from the apartment. It's a cool, quiet night. I get off, my mind preoccupied with how I'll make Nina agree to move out. And what if Daniel is home? How will I face him? As I'm walking home, I hear whining coming from the bushes by the sidewalk. It sounds like a hurt animal. I go over there slowly and see a large dog laying by the sidewalk. His front paw is visibly hurt and, overall, he's is in terrible shape. Skinny, mange all over his body, hardly any hair. I look around, there aren't many people. I squat in front of him, offering him my hand to sniff,

"You okay, baby?" I whisper, inching closer. He stands up, his hurt paw in the air, he turns ready to run if I come any closer. I step back, not wanting him to get away. An older man sees my efforts to get close to the dog, and decides to help me. We spend the next hour I trying to get the dog calm enough to allow us to approach, I look up the directions to the nearest vet that's open and luckily it's only a seven minute walk from where we are. The dog doesn't trust me, though, so it takes a whole lot of food and patience to finally get close to him. Together with the older man, I manage to capture the dog and pick him up. Thanking the man for his help, I make my way to the vet. Though he must only weigh about fifteen kilos, he's heavy in my arms, so I am relieved when I finally see the clinic in front of me.

The vet looks him over with a grim expression and tells me that it's likely the dog was hit by a car, which fractured his front paw. She also says that the condition of his skin is dire. At first, she holds that the dog is too old for what would be an expensive treatment and that it would be kinder to just put him down. I insist on going ahead with the treatment and agree to pay for the three-thousand-dollar surgery. I don't have the money, but I decide I'll worry about that later. I leave the dog with the vet and head home.

As I'm about to cross a road, I feel something is off. That feeling of being watched. I look around me. Nothing. I must just be paranoid. No wonder with everything that's happened to Lara. I continue my walk home. A few minutes later, I get that feeling again. This time when I turn, chills run down my spine. There's a man about fifty meters behind me. The fact that there's a man isn't the creepy part. The creepy part is that he stopped when I turned. He stopped and then stepped behind the nearest building. Like he's hiding from me. I only saw him for a moment, but it was enough to notice that he was unusually tall. He was either wearing a bulky jacket, or he was a large, well-built man. I still have close to ten minutes to my apartment. I look around, not many people on the street. But maybe I imagined it. Maybe he's not following me at all.

I continue to walk, my steps rapid. If he's following me, I'll be able to tell, he'd have to walk fast to catch up. A minute later, I turn around. My fears are confirmed when a tall shadow bobs behind a car at the exact moment I turn. My heart rate picks up. I'm being followed. It's dark, I'm alone, and I'm being followed. I don't waste a moment longer; I start running full speed towards the apartment. I don't stop to check if he's following me. I don't want to give him an advantage by slowing down.

I run up the set of steps to the apartment, unlock the door in record time and walk in, slamming it behind me. Phil, who's sitting at the dining table, looks up with surprise,

"What's wrong?" he asks, standing up, "is someone after you?"

I shake my head no, breathing heavily to catch my breath,

"You look like you saw a ghost. You sure you're okay?" I nod, stepping forward.

I'm not sure what to do. Do I call the police just off this? And what, tell them I think someone is after me? What will they do for me when they're not even doing anything to help Lara? I know there's no point bothering with them. But then what? Should I call Lara? And add to her fears? No, I can't do that. But I can't just sit there pretending nothing happened, either.

I take off my shoes, my jacket, and then someone opens the front door. Daniel. Our eyes meet. My first thought is that he walked in a minute after me. A minute. Like he was right behind me the whole time. I tremble, he frowns. I don't say a word. I can't. I'm actually scared for my life. Yes, Phil is in the room, but so what? I don't even know Phil. They're friends. They could be in it together for all I know. Without turning my back to Daniel, I move towards my room. When I reach it, I walk in, slamming the door behind me. I lean my back against it, still breathing heavily from my run,

"What's up with her?" I hear Phil ask,

"Found her in my room earlier" I hear Daniel's angry voice, "snooping through my shit"

"You serious? Why would she do that?"

"That's what I want to know" I hear steps approach my room, a heavy knock on my door,

"Sofia?" Daniel calls, "open up"

"No" I say,

"You're acting weird, we need to talk"

"I said no!" I yell. He remains silent for a long moment, then his hand slams the door frame, I lean against the door harder, fully expecting him to try to break in,

"This needs to stop, Sofia. I'm telling you! I'm over this shit!" he hisses and then I hear him walk off. I let myself slide to the ground, my back still against the door. I feel my body quiver. My suspicion that Daniel has something to do with Lara's case is now strong. What are the chances that someone would follow me today? The exact day that I went to Daniel's room. It's like he's warning me now. Maybe even scaring me on purpose. Toying with me. I can't wait for Nina to get home. We have to move out. There's no two ways about it. We need to get away from Daniel.