HIStory & Hers (Trilogy for "Inhaling Alongside You")

Chapter Five: Why You Wanna Trip On Me?

Michael, I want you to know that you don't have to hide from me. I don't want you to hide from me" I stress, now watching the water relieve him of suds.

"I'm not hiding. It's just... It's hard Jess. It's hard trying to be perfect" He admits.

Taking another inch towards him, I cup his chiseled jaw in my measurably smaller palms.

"Michael, you are perfect. Not the dictionaries definition. You're the true definition of perfection. You really are Michael"

"Jess... I'm not. Not at all" He sighs, now avoiding my eyes.

"Baby look at me"

He obeys, his eyes reddening.

"In my eyes, you are every bit of perfect that you don't see. Michael don't shut me out. I love you. I love you so much" I stress, feeling the sting of tears as well.

Slowly wrapping his arms around my waist, he carefully steps closer. Anxiousness still very well resides in his eyes as he dares himself to press our bare bodies against each other. Whether it's the water evaporating from the showerhead or the mere fact that Michael and I are this close, I'm warming inside.

At this moment alone, I know there's not a doubt in my mind. I love Michael Joseph Jackson.

"You want to what now?" He asks, his tone tenses and certainly unfocused.

It's been confirmed, I'm a little over a month now. There is indeed a bun in my oven.

I found out during a recent in-home doctor's visit (After having a positive pregnancy test). Where indeed Doctor Arnold confirmed that we shall be expecting a little one in a matter of eight months (Give or take a few weeks).

I'm excited, anxious, and definitely, a tab bit terrified. This will put another damper on my tour. In four days I'm expected to be on a plane to Tokyo. I don't know if Mark knows about my pregnancy or not, but I do not he's really counting on me to be there. Well, it is my tour. I don't want to let him down, or my growing fan base.

It's a huge deal for me to choose between. If I stay in California, I'll be here for two months until Michael goes back on tour. If I leave, I'll be leaving my family and I'm sure Michael will worry about me being "Alone". This has been eating at me since I confirmed my pregnancy. I wish there was an easy way out, but there isn't.

It's either my dream or my family.

"Baby, I want to continue my tour..." I repeat eying him carefully.

Loose curls frame his face carelessly. A thrown-on v-neck covers him snugly. His almonds, gleaming without luster. His expression, pained and distant. He isn't happy and it visibly shows.

Tomorrow we have a planned meeting with Evan and his lawyer. He requested that Michael meet him at this secluded location with a checkbook; alone with his own lawyer. I of course refuse to allow that to happen, so tomorrow I will be accompanying Michael on this little "business exchange." Michael and I hope that this will shut the great prune up for good. We don't necessarily know what he wants, but I'm sure is rectangular and green.

In addition to his worries about Evan and the meeting, he's been having a hard time wrapping his head around my unexpected pregnancy and both of our resuming tours. He believes and wishes to trust I would stay home or just travel with him until his tour is over. He claims it's the only "safe" way to solve this problem.

I disagree.

"Babygirl, why? You can postpone it, can't you?" He stresses, running a frustrated hand through the careless curls.