Why are friends a lot like snow?
If you pee on them they disappear.
Humpty Dumpty had a great fall...
And a pretty good spring and summer too.
What's black and white and eats like a horse?
A zebra.
What do a banana and a helicopter have in common?
Neither of them is a police officer.
What's the difference between a rabbit and a grape?
They're both purple, except the rabbit isn't.
A horse walks into a bar...
Several people get up and leave as they recognize the potential danger in the situation.
I was diagnosed with clinical depression the other day.
Which made me sad.
My friend always complains that my jokes have irrelevant punchlines.
I wonder why.
Why was six afraid of seven?
It wasn't. Numbers aren't sentient and are incapable of feeling fear.
What's brown and sticky?
A stick.
Why did the blonde get fired from the M&M factory?
Because of her repeated absences and stealing.
What's green, red, orange, purple, blue and yellow?
Colors.
Mary had a little lamb...
The doctor fainted.
Knock, knock.
Who's there?
The postman.
The postman who?
Look do you want this parcel or not?
You can pick your nose and you can pick your friends.
But you can't rob a bank. That's a felony.
What's the difference between a guitar and a fish?
One's a musical instrument, the other's an animal.
What's orange and tastes like an orange?
An orange.
What do friends and trees have in common?
They both fall over if you hit them repeatedly with an axe.
What's the difference between a baby and a watermelon?
One's fun to shoot with a rocket launcher, I'll let you guess which one.
ВЫ ЧИТАЕТЕ
Dark Jokes.
Юморverrryyy dark Jokes, and don't get offended by these, they are not my jokes I did not make them (mostly), so don't go raving at me.
