I'm fine, leave me alone!

chapter 2 - knives

- Story originally written 20th January 2020, fully edited 18th March 2023 and further edited 30th December 2023.
- This part originally re-published March 18th 2023. Renamed 31st December 2023.

Warnings:
> MAJOR DESCRIPTIONS of abuse (physical and verbal)
> Mentions of blood
> Body image issues and eating disorder qualities

This chapter leads on from the last chapter

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Harry looked at himself in the mirror, he had one word he thought every time he saw himself, disgusting.

He placed his shaky hands on the door handle, this is gonna be bad.

The next morning Harry woke up in agonising pain, fuck was the only word racing through his mind, he looked around the room, blood over the floor, his clothes, his bed. Today was the day he would be heading back to Hogwarts, he stood up careful not to make noise and got dressed in an oversized hoodie and jeans. After setting the food on the table, bacon, eggs, hash browns, beans and sausages, the sight of food made Harry's stomach hurt and mouth water he hadn't eaten for a few days, a slice of buttered bread had kept him going for the past week. Yet he still thought he looked far too big, so maybe it was for the best. He heard Vernon thumping down the staircase, he sat down and soon after, finished his food. 

"What's your name again?"

Quietly spoken, as he always is towards Vernon, the boy replied, "Harry."

"Oh yeah.. Harry" He spoke like he was testing the name out, "We're leaving in an hour." 

Harry stuttered out a quiet "Okay." before the whale walked to the drawer and grabbed a knife, "I have some... frustrations I need to get out, and we need to make up for the time you're gone, don't we?" Harry gulped, an hour and a half of this, this is gonna be bad.

He tried backing up, doing anything he could to get away from the man holding a knife, twenty minutes later Harry had cuts up and down his arms. Vernon decided to take a little break saying how tiring this work was. Only a few minutes later he continued and started to carve a word into Harry's back.

He couldn't tell what the word was but a little while later they were ready to leave, Harry arm was covered in cuts with 2 or more words carved into his back, he managed to get the bleeding to stop on his back with a simple spell [IN THIS BOOK, healing spells are a thing but on yourself you can only stop the bleeding only another person can completely heal someone else's wound unless they have a pre-made type of potion]  Harry felt exhausted, he tried to do the same spell to his arms but nothing happened, he released he was too tired to perform any more spells and instead weakly made his way to the bathroom, found his hidden kit he'd placed in there and bandaged up his arms and stomach, thankfully I stopped the bleeding on my back that would have been too difficult to stop by hand. 

Harry decided he'd clean up the blood on his skin later, he didn't have time to do it right now If he wanted to catch his train out of this prison. Harry put his hoodie back on which fortunately covered most of his injuries, except the words carved on the back of his hand.

Ugly
Die.

Worthless.

He'd already placed a glamour charm on his face when he was bandaging up his arms.

[there isn't a lot of terminology surrounding the glamour charm so let's just pretend, that in this book, you have to apply the glamour charm to each individual body part so your face is separate from your two separate arms]

"Come on!" Vernon shouted starting to loose his patience with the young boy, that was the last thing Harry wanted to happen. He grabbed his trunk with the small amount of things he owned, a few t-shirts, a few pairs of trousers and a jumper, and then picked up Hedwig who was sitting comfortably in her cage.

Now Harry was sitting in the back seat, Vernon never let him sit at the front, that's for family. His trunk lay in the boot of the car and Hedwig, in her cage, on his lap, he couldn't risk her getting hurt; she is the closest thing to a friend or family Harry has ever had. 

Seeing as Hermione and Ron had stabbed him in the back.

A few months ago,

Harry was making his way to the Gryffindor common room to see Hermione and Ron, excited because he had no classes with either of them today so he hadn't seen them since this morning. He got to the door and was about to start talking to his friends but he heard them having a conversation so he decided to listen to what they were saying, he still wishes he hadn't listened in...

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755 words - chapter two: knives