Anguish & Affection

Part 13

As her friend trembled before her, she felt a wave of anger and pity wash over her. She wanted to lash out at the man who had wronged her, but part of her knew that it was not her time. "And your sister? Aditi Di? Where is she?" she asked softly, though the words tasted like ash in her mouth. The empathetic part of her wanted to offer comfort to her friend, but the shattered woman inside her refused to extend any kindness to the one responsible for causing this pain. She struggled to find a balance between loyalty to her friend and loyalty to herself.

He pulled away from the embrace, his answer of "She is in the hospital. Slowly recuperating" hanging heavy in the air between them. He felt a deep chill settle over him as he saw her eyes clouded with pain and fear, a stark reminder of the torment he had inflicted on her over the course of just a few hours. His heart sank as he realized that his nearness was unwelcome, and an ache spread through him at the thought that he had already done irrevocable damage.

Stepping away from him, she inquired, "Where has she gone?" Her expression became one of relief as she put space between them.

"She doesn't have the strongest immune system, so she's susceptible to illnesses," he said, his fists stuffed into his pockets as a frown formed on his face. "But she's doing much better now."

Diya felt her heart sink as she heard the news of the older woman's sickly health. Even though they had been close friends in her childhood, Diya found herself conflicted between showing compassion or feeling animosity. She knew that her emotions were running high, but no matter how hard she tried, she could not decide which feeling to choose.

A strangled apology escaped her lips, yet the words seemed to hang in the air between them - a tangible reminder of her guilt. Her eyes brimmed with sadness as she looked into his gaze, the myriad emotions of conflict reflecting back at her. He replied, his voice no more than a whisper, "Don't be sorry. It is not your fault, no matter what I try to make myself believe."

***

As he stood in her doorway, Atharv noticed the change in her behavior. "Ah, I notice you're not taking it out on your food anymore. That's a great improvement," he remarked encouragingly.

"My brain won't be able to work as effectively if I'm starving, so if I want to figure out something or make a plan then I should eat," she explained. The warmth that had filled their previous conversation was now gone.

He gave her a look, then suddenly crossed his arms across his chest. "You know, at the end of the day, all your plans will be useless— I'm not going to let you leave me again," he declared.

The woman's voice wavered as she spoke, desperation and sadness laced into her every word. "A woman can hope, can't she? Hope to find freedom, to get her life back, her parents back...and maybe even her friend." Her gaze hardened upon the last word, searching for his reaction. Atharv laughed mirthlessly, his head shaking like a condemned man in his final moments of life.

His accusing eyes bore into her as his words echoed, cutting her deeply with its sharpness. "It was you who had abandoned your friend, not me. So, it should be my prayer that has to be answered, for getting my friend back," he declared, his voice laced with a venomous anger that hung in the air like an oppressive fog.

"I didn't mean literally. I was talking about the relationship we used to have, the connection and tenderness that had evaporated," she murmured, her gaze diverted away from his to focus on her meal.

"No, I don't know you either," he replied. Then, he asked if he could enter her room, catching her off guard with both his words and request. Nevertheless, she would not let her surprise be advantageous for him.

"No, you cannot," she answered firmly, their eyes locking in an intense exchange.

"I'm sorry for hugging you earlier," he said in a remorseful voice, his apology surprising her.

"Out of all the foolish things you have done since we met, that was not one of them," she said as her eyebrows rose and an unmistakable combination of pain and mockery shone in her eyes. "But strangely, this is the one thing that you decided to apologize for."

"I am fully aware that no matter how contrite I may be, it won't make a difference," he said, his face betraying the lingering guilt in his eyes. "Even I wouldn't accept an apology for my wrongdoings."

"So why do something like that if you already knew it was wrong?" Her own surprise coming through in her voice, she was not expecting him to confess and admit his actions were off-base.

He hung his head in shame, having no good answer for her fierce questioning. "It was the only way I thought I could get what I wanted," he muttered under his breath, before she cut him off with a sharp outburst.

"Only way? What on earth possessed you to make such misguided choices? And what helped this sudden realization? Or is your sister involved in this realization?" Her voice seethed as she slammed her plate onto the table, her eyes blazing with anger.

Her last dregs of patience were rapidly draining away as he continued to dodge the real reason behind his actions. He used every trick in the book to keep her from seeing the truth that everyone else, even her own family, had no problem deciphering, which only increased her boiling frustration.

"What caused the shift? I'm not sure. My emotions toward you have changed without a doubt. At first, I was insistent on keeping us free from developing any strong bonds of affection, but it seems that my feelings for you are much stronger than I want to acknowledge."