Anguish & Affection

The End

Atharv's heart clenched painfully as he watched Diya, slumped and broken, staring at the videos of her past with her beloved father. In the footage, she was a mere year old, giggling and babbling as her father tickled her. But now, her eyes reflected only sorrow and longing, robbed of the unadulterated love she once knew.

The words of her late father echoed in Diya's mind, causing a sudden rush of grief that threatened to consume her. She let out a desperate laugh, tears streaming down her face and pooling in her hazel eyes. Her heart felt like it was being squeezed in a vice as she scrolled through old photos on her phone, each one a cherished memory that now brought fresh pain. Her trembling fingers traced the contours of her father's face on the screen, trying to hold onto his image before succumbing to another wave of tears, her whole body shaking with sorrow and longing.

As Atharv's mind drifted back to the day he lost his parents, his heart clenched with a mixture of hatred and sorrow. His anger burned like a wildfire, consuming any trace of pain that threatened to overwhelm him. He had someone to blame - someone to bear the weight of his grief and guilt. But the woman standing before him had no such relief. She was battered and broken, her soul drowning in agony. Unlike Atharv, her conscience tormented her without mercy. In her own eyes, she was the true culprit - the daughter whose actions drove her father to take his own life.

Atharv took a deep breath and gathered his courage before entering the room.

"Diya, it's time for you to have your meal."

Without looking at him, Diya nodded to acknowledge his presence. She quickly glanced at her laptop screen one final time before closing it with her left hand and trying to hold back her tears. Atharv sat down next to her after setting the plate on the side table and moving the laptop out of the way.

"What's all this?" she asked softly, her voice rough from holding back her emotions, as she looked at the various dishes on the plate.

Atharv's face contorts in a mix of surprise and frustration at her question, but he quickly regains control over his features. "It's the ritual," he says through clenched teeth, "to prepare his favorite dishes." As he lists off the delicacies from Karnataka, her heart sinks deeper into an abyss of guilt and shame. How could she have not known her own father's favorites after twenty-six long years of life? The realization hits her like a tidal wave, overwhelming and suffocating her with regret.

Tears streamed down Diya's face as she confessed, "I never knew what his favorites were. I'm a terrible daughter." She hit her head in frustration and continued to cry until Atharv grabbed her hand and stopped her from causing herself any more harm.

"Diya, don't be so hard on yourself!" Atharv exclaimed, gently holding her face with one hand.

"I know he wouldn't want me to hate myself, but I caused him enough pain for him to end his life. I even wished for it at one point! I was selfish and cruel." Diya's voice trembled with emotion as she spoke.

Atharv silenced her and grasped her by the shoulders, gazing into her turbulent eyes with his empathetic ones. "You're only human, Diya. Your anger was justified, and you wouldn't have said or done anything to make him take his own life if you had known! And it's not uncommon for people to feel a desire for someone's demise in a fit of rage. Don't blame yourself," he reassured her.

Diya's lashes brushed against her cheeks as she looked down, tears cascading over them. Her chest heaved with a tumultuous inner turmoil. Droplets streamed down her nose, but she had no energy to think about them, let alone brush them away.

"Did he know how much I loved him? Did I do enough to show him, especially when things were good? I don't know, Atharv. All I want is to tell him how much he meant to me, but I can't." She leaned into his embrace, her head resting against his chest.

Atharv wrapped his arm around her shoulders and gently ran his fingers through her tangled hair, trying to soothe the pounding in her head.

"He couldn't have missed that, Diya. He knew there was love behind your anger towards him. When I think of the two of you, I see a father and daughter who deeply cared for each other. The recent events may have caused some strain, but they cannot diminish the love you've shared for years," he comforted her, gently massaging her scalp as she sniffled at the mention of love.

"Do you really think so?" she asked, gazing into his eyes as if searching for the truth. Atharv nodded with a sad smile on his face, confirming her suspicions. "Yes, you believe that we go to heaven after we die, right? If that's true, then your father would have watched all of this from above and been disappointed in your actions. He would have seen you as a baby, running into his arms with love, waiting for him to come home from work as a child, and striving to make him proud as an adult. But don't blame yourself, Diya. That's not what he would want. And neither would your mother or I."

A tense and heavy silence engulfed the couple, holding them in a moment of shared vulnerability. She spoke up first, her voice trembling as she sought reassurance.

"I'm not a bad person, am I?" Her question hung heavily in the air.

He gently placed his cold hands on her jaw and looked into her eyes with tenderness.

"Absolutely not. You did what you believed was right, and that doesn't make you a bad person. Those hurtful words don't define who you are as much as you think they do. You remained true to your father's teachings, even when he may have forgotten them. He would be proud of you."

Diya bit her lips to stifle the urge to scream, not wanting to cause any more worry for her mother. Her trembling hands reached for his and held on tightly, as if he were a lifeline during an inevitable fall. She spoke with sincere gratitude in her voice, "I don't know how I could have survived these trying times without you. I can't let my mother see me break down, but I also can't keep these sobs from rising in my throat. Your presence and support mean everything to me." As she spoke, her eyes lovingly traced over his exhausted features like a gentle caress.

"My presence by your side will remain constant, no matter what trials or triumphs come our way. I understand that nothing will be the same for you, Diya, but that doesn't mean your heart won't find moments of lightness and ease. It might seem insurmountable now, but I assure you, there will come a day when you can see beyond the emptiness in your life. And till that day, on that day, and every day after, I'll be here to support you." He gently caressed her cheeks as she weakly smiled at him, his promise cemented between them.

Her voice barely above a whisper, she told him, "I love you," as she rested her head on his chest. The rhythm of his heartbeats echoed her words louder than any utterance ever could. "I love you too, Diya. I promise it will get easier and one day, you'll be able to remember your father with a smile instead of tears." He wrapped his arm around her, and she cried into his chest, her tears soaking through his linen shirt. They both knew the road ahead would not be easy, but their love would only grow stronger in the face of adversity. And that was something he was sure of.

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