Strings

Chapter 23

Hayden

Avery sits across from me, her face both pensive and eager.

She knows the water's that she thought were once unfamiliar are now dangerous and hungry.

She is more comfortable around me now though, I can feel it. When she looks at me, she's no more afraid, if anything she looks tired. But the fear isn't there anymore and that makes me feel, I don't know, relieved?

It killed me everytime Avery would look at me with fear in her eyes. As if I could ever hurt her. Or let anyone else hurt her. She flinches at my anger and outbursts but overall seems to have crossed over some bridge between us, where she seems more comfortable in my company and that knowledge gives me a weird feeling at the pit of my gut I just can't pinpoint.

How she's doing it, I have no idea. But she is.

She looks hesitant as she clears her throat.

"You promise not to lie to me?" she asks in a tiny voice, that just about breaks my heart. Something I didnt even think was possible.

To be betrayed by the people you have lived all your life being immensely close to must hurt more than all of her injuries combined.

And even then she wasn't aware of the worst of it yet. All she knew that she could no longer trust that family of hers. That somehow they've made her the scrapegoat in matters that quite frankly have nothing to do with her.

I clear my throat.

"you don't ever have to worry about that." I say and I meant it. I would never lie to her. Not now, not ever.

"I need to know what is going on"
"From the very beginning"

I look at her.
She doesn't deserve this.

"It's not going to be easy." I say slowly, waiting for her reaction.

She offers me a sad smile in return, one that breaks my heart, twists it and fills me with the insanely strong need to protect her from the treachery that I am about to reveal to her.

She takes a deep breath and adds
"Nothing ever is."

****

Avery

I am not quite sure I completely comprehend exactly what I feel. For one its hard to believe. Hayden sits across for me expecting a response, a reaction, an outburst of anger, maybe tears? but I have nothing to offer him.

Hell, I have nothing to offer to myself. Its like my entire life I was made to sit in front of a painting, and told, 'hey Avery, see that painting over there, that's your whole life, you cant turn around and you can't look anywhere else but that's one neat-ass painting huh?' and like the idiot I am, I not only agreed to it, I've lived by it, abided by it.

I look up to have Hayden's eyes meet mine. They're still searching for something. Anything.

Searching, calculating, deducing like they always always are. But I need time to myself.

Having nothing to say to him, I excuse myself with a nod and hurriedly stand up, momentarily forgetting the current physical state my literally beaten up body was in.

"Goddamn it Avery, you're hurt all over, you've got to be more careful moving around" Hayden says exasperated, coming over to my side just as quickly and before I can help myself I hear myself refusing him.

"No"

"I can move around by myself thank you very much" I don't mean for it to come out so harsh but I was just suddenly so angry I couldnt process anything beyond it.