Runaway World

Trauma Therapy

     They transferred Valentina to Philip's rover for the rest of the expedition. Like all the rovers, it only had two bedrooms. Andrew wondered what the sleeping arrangements would be over there, then decided it was none of his business.

     The three children spent most of the rest of the journey across Atlantica Planitia in their rooms, which was unusual. Andrew suspected it was because James needed time to process what had happened aboard the Yang rover. He needed to come to terms with his close call with death and the shock of seeing Li's body, probably mangled in some awful way. David and Jasmine were keeping him company, he thought. Just being with him. Giving him the comfort of their presence. Hoping he would open up if they just waited long enough.

     James, though, if he was typical of teenage boys in general, was probably afflicted with a bad case of masculine pride. He was probably afraid that, if he showed them how disturbed and shaken up he was, the rest of his family would see him as weak, still a child. The idea exasperated Andrew no end. Didn't James know how much they all loved him? Didn't they know how proud his father was of him? Didn't he know that he, Andrew, had also been afraid and emotionally upset many times?

     Of course he didn't know, he realised with a shock, because he'd never told him. James knew that his father had seen terrible things while chasing Reginald Fox, but Andrew had always made light of it whenever he'd been asked. He'd wanted to protect his children. Keep them from knowing about the horrors that the world could inflict on even the strongest and the most careful. Now, though, James was taking his silence as an example to follow. He thought that his father had been teaching him to show a brave front. To stay strong for the people around him.

     It was clear to them all, though, that James had something on his mind. It was written all over him. In the way he tended to stare off into the distance for minutes at a time, requiring a tap on the shoulder to get his attention. In the way he gave clipped, often monosyllabic answers to questions as if he was so busy dealing with whatever was going on in his brain that he had no time for outside distractions. Andrew saw David and Jasmine giving each other worried glances before staring at their parents, their eyes telling them that something needed to be done. They're right, Andrew knew. He had to talk to him. He had to talk to all of them. He had to tell them the things he should have told them right from the start.

     Susan was in the cockpit, keeping an eye on things, so Andrew climbed to the upper level and knocked on the door of his children's bedroom. "Okay if I come in?" he asked.

     "Sure," Jasmine replied. Andrew opened the door to see the three of them all sitting on their beds staring down at their tablet computers. They all had their remote schooling apps open on the screens, but it was very clear that there wasn't any learning being done. Instead, there was a tense atmosphere in the room. David and Jasmine were waiting for James to talk, to open up to them, but he wouldn't. He didn't know how to give voice to whatever was inside of him.

     "It's James I really wanted to talk to," said Andrew. James looked up guiltily, wondering what he'd done wrong, and Andrew waved a hand at him reassuringly. "I wanted to talk about what happened back there," he said. "At the crevasse, but you other guys can stay as well. You all need to hear this."

     David and Jasmine, who'd tensed up to leave, nodded and relaxed again on their beds.

     "I know I've already said this," said Andrew to James, "but I just wanted to tell you how proud I am of you. The way you handled yourself out there. I know you must have been terrified. I know what that's like, to be scared."

     "I wasn't scared," James protested, bristling indignantly.

     "Yes you were," replied Andrew, "and there's nothing wrong with that. I've been scared, many times. Most lately when we were chasing Fox to Etna Mons. The way I was accused of being a remainer. The way they thought I was helping Fox to escape. I was scared of what you guys would think of me if you believed the accusations."