The Lost Queen

Ch. 7: Not Enough

It had been four hours of on-and-off crying in Jarrah's room for Rayne before she caught wind of Jarrah's soon return from her handmaid, Makaia.

She didn't care that her face was blotchy from crying or that she threw up all the food from lunch only an hour before. It didn't matter that her cheeks were flushed, her eyes sore, and her body ached. She still climbed out of bed as fast as her body could let her, and raced through the palace until she got to the front of the palace where she knew Jarrah, some of his guards, and Senator Terryn would be flying in at. Hell, she didn't even care that Takoum was following silently behind her.

Rayne's stomach tugged with excitement once she saw them fly in, eager to see Jarrah after the awful day she's had. The thought of him also having a lead on their killer almost made her sorrow worth it. She could deal with uncomfortable lunches with Nuni if it meant getting information on leads.

What she didn't expect, however, was the strange way her muscles tightened and the hot burn across her chest when Jarrah and Terryn laughed at something she couldn't hear. She knew it had to stem from the doubt Nuni had planted in her mind at not being enough, but it still didn't stop her old thoughts from resurfacing. Her old fears of never being accepted as Terryn's replacement rose and transformed into wondering if her child would ever be enough for the people there.

The lump returned to her throat as she blinked the tears back. Jarrah's brown-eyed gaze sought her out across the courtyard and his entire face lit up just at the sight of her. Terryn opened her mouth to say something to him, but Jarrah was already speeding his way over to Rayne, a smile overtaking his lips. Rayne didn't miss the flash of confusion and hurt that moved over Terryn's face as she followed his gaze and found her already staring.

Terryn waved at her, but the small smile was weak. Rayne waved back despite her ache for the poor girl, and then turned her attention to Jarrah who reached for her face. She didn't even have time to smile at him before he finished leaning the rest of the way down to kiss her. Her cheeks warmed at the attention they must have received from the guardsmen and Terryn, but the kiss didn't last long before he pulled back.

"I'm sorry for being gone so long," he apologized, brushing one of her curls behind her ear. His other hand came down to inconspicuously stroke against the front of her stomach with affection. "I've mis—"

Jarrah froze mid-sentence, his eyes finally taking her in. Rayne's inner cheek sought solace between her teeth.

"Rayne," he growled, his voice low with barely controlled anger. "Why were you crying?"

"I wasn't crying," she lied. Damn puffy eyes. "My eyes were just bothering me today, but I'm fine."

He narrowed his gaze, unconvinced. "What did my mother say to you?"

"She didn't say anything. I'm fine, Jarrah."

"You're obviously not fine if you were crying, Rayne."

She forced herself to smile and ran a soothing hand down his tensed arm. "I'm just a little more sensitive than usual, is all. Pregnancy isn't for the weak," she half-heartedly joked. "Now, did you get a lead?"

Jarrah's lips thinned. "Before I confront my mother, because we both know you aren't going to tell me the truth, yes, we got a lead. We don't know who it is, but our informant thinks they have a scent to follow."

"A scent? And—wait—hold on a minute, what did you say?"

"You know exactly what I said," he quipped as he gripped her hand and marched them towards the palace.

"Jarrah, don't! It's not that big of a deal," Rayne protested, trying and failing to pull him away.

"That's a damn lie and you know it," he spat. He threw a hard look at Takoum who was walking five steps behind them. "Who upset her, Takoum?"