Ten Days with Mr Darcy (on hold)

Chapter seven - The confidante

Their first three scenes in front of the public worked out better than Jess expected. The beautiful rooms of Exley Hall provided the perfect backdrop, giving their small, transitory audience the sense that they were seeing conversations from the past unfold before them.

While everything ran smoothly on stage, behind the doors, where the remaining cast waited in silence, the atmosphere was strung as taut as a violin string. In the short break between scenes, Sebastian's mood had changed. No longer was he the charming gentleman who entertained them with jokes during rehearsal. Now, he sat alone, quiet and brooding as he stared at the floor. Not knowing him well she couldn't tell if it was part of his process of becoming Darcy, or whether something else was bothering him.

Being most in demand, as Elizabeth, Jessica didn't get the opportunity to ask until later. The green room was half empty, as most of their group had already finished eating. Mr. Gardiner and Trevor sat in the chairs, viewing the lunchtime news. Mrs Gardiner's attention was fixed on her puzzle book by the window. Everyone else had disappeared, leaving Darcy and Jess alone at the table. After watching him push a lone pea around his plate for almost a minute, she said, "Is everything alright?"

He sat back in his chair, rubbing his face with his hand. "Sorry. I'm probably not the best company right now."

"If you need someone to cheer you up, I suspect Mrs Rivers-Smithe would be willing to help."

Silverware clattered as he pushed his plate away. "Why does everybody think—?" He bit off the rest of the sentence, his lips compressed in a hard line. After a moment, he sucked in a breath, releasing it slowly. "I'm sorry. Women like that...they believe they only have to snap their fingers, and we'll run to them like lemmings off a cliff. It's hardly a flattering assumption."

"Do older women make those sort of offers often?"

"It happens, and it's not always the cougars, either. People seem to have this idea that every man has only one thing on their mind. To them, I'm no better than a sex-starved gigolo, and they're desperate for anyone who will fill the gaping chasm in their lonely existence. What I want, or don't want, doesn't seem to matter."

"It must be awkward, particularly when you're working. I have a similar problem when I'm doing a few extra hours at the pub. The drunks are lining up to walk me home."

"And how do you say no without offending your regular customers?"

"I don't worry about that. I have to repeat myself five or six times, and talk really slow, but they usually get the message. They're harmless, really. But surely you don't have a problem making your feelings clear."

Sebastian raked his fingers through his hair, his voice pitched for her ears alone. "I realise I might give people the impression that I'm oh-so-confident, and I do try to be, but when something like that happens, I never know what to say, or how to say no without upsetting the woman, or causing a scene."

His revelation surprised her, but she tried not to show it. "I think it says a lot about you as a person that you worry about someone else's feelings, especially when they don't consider yours."

"Experience has taught me that the best reaction is to say nothing, as a refusal often offends, and I would hate to offend the sort of person who owns a house like this." His attention returned to his plate, lost in thought as he studied the remnants of pie crust. After a moment's reflection, he looked up, meeting her eyes. "It's frustrating that I couldn't just be honest, and say what I really thought. I also have to think about our little project. Mandy doesn't deserve the hassle, so I didn't dare annoy our hostess."