Before We Say Goodbye

Chapter 9; day three: wednesday

Chapter 9;

day three: wednesday

For the past few days after me and Mason had the talk, surprisingly he would come home after his work is done. I thought he would not listen and still see Stella after work hours but knowing them maybe they were seeing each other before or during work hours.

But to be honest? I don't really care anymore if he would not go home after his work is done. The pain of Mason back stabbing me isn't that strong as before maybe because I already accepted it and decided self-love's so much more important than loving someone who can't even love you the same; just isn't worth it losing yourself over someone who doesn't feel the same way as you.

Mason is the CEO of B&M Architecture, we both sacrificed a lot just to make that company where it is right now and thankfully our efforts were worth it because B&M Architecture is one of the most popular and successful architecture here in the city and before everything fell down we were even planning on branching out but I don't know if he'll still go on with our plan. 

My shift usually ends at around 2 pm and by that time Mason gets me from my workplace and then brings me home and during the car rides we usually talk just about anything, it certainly feels as if it was just like the old times before our downfall happened a year and a half ago.

By 2:30 pm, I usually am the one getting Luke from his school and surprisingly, we were so close right now and I was ecstatic. We would talk about his day at school, sing songs along the radio if only we were familiar with the song and then eat different foods from fastfoods everytime and sometimes we even go to restaurants that we haven't eaten from before and rate how much we like it.

It was nice having a chance to spend time with my son even when it's only for a limited time.

Right now, XO Tour Life was on the radio by Lil Uzi Vert.

"I don't really care if you cry!" Luke sang at the top of his lungs well technically he screamed but on mine and Luke's book, it was singing.

"On the real you should've never lied!" I sang.

"Should've saw the way she looked me in my eyes!" Luke sang.

"She said baby I am not afraid to," I sang.

"Die!" We both sang together.

"Push me to the edge
All my friends are dead
Push me to the edge
All my friends are dead
Push me to the edge
All my friends are dead
Push me to the edge." We both looked at each other with both of our faces beaming and then laughed and continued singing the rest of the song in the car.

The next song was can't help falling in love originally by Elvis Presley but this one was a cover and I felt my smile falter and so I just resulted to keeping my mouth shut.

after all this was Mason and I's song.

Wise men says only fools rush in but I can't help falling in love with you.

The song continued playing in the background and there's this dull ache in my chest that I know wouldn't go away forever but nevertheless I looked on the bright side, the happy moments we shared before and smiled, thankful that at least I think in those years we were together there were moments that I can say that he loved me. I'll always treasure those moments because when Mason loves, he loves wholeheartedly it isn't his fault he fell out of love, we're humans after all we have no control of some of our emotions especially love.

I pulled on the side to park at Nando's.

"Hey mom?" I shut the ignition and looked over at Luke to see him looking curious.

"Yeah, hun?" I asked him while getting my bag on the back and checking I have everything in side, when he didn't reply I looked over at him and his brows was furrowed.

"Isn't that song the one that played on the radio yours and dad's song?" I froze and unbuckled my seatbelt.

"Yeah, it was." I then quickly unbuckled him from his seatbelt.

"Mom, why do people fall out of love?" I froze.

Not really knowing what to say and so I sighed and smiled a little at him.

"You wouldn't understand, Luke. Maybe when you're older I can tell you or tell my opinion on why but to answer your question, maybe they weren't really meant to fall in love in the first place." and before he could ask more questions I quickly changed the topic.

"You hungry, hun? Momma's kinda hungry." And at that his stomach grumbled and we looked at each other and laughed and then we quickly headed to his and Mason's favorite restaurant.

I didn't know what to feel. How could a 7 year old child ask questions about falling in love?

I hoped that he wouldn't be afraid to open his soul and  fall in love just because his dad and mom's marriage didn't work out.

Falling in love is one of the beautiful feeling we humans get to experience and we may have our heartbroken along the way but if it means getting your heartbroken just to see the people you love happy then it's all worth it because falling in love after all is a selfless feeling of putting the one you love's happiness above yours.