A Hufflepuff's Loyalty

Chapter 12

I stared at Snape wide-eyed as he dropped himself onto the chair behind his desk. "I guess Rosier never told you this, then?" he said gruffly.

"No, he bloody didn't!" I snapped. "What else do you know?"

Snape averted his gaze. "Nothing. You should go."

"Bullshit!" I dropped my bag on the floor and took two large steps to reach his desk. Something squeezed my insides together and I felt like I was going to throw up. But not before Snape had told me everything he knew. "If they knew who I descended from, then they knew how to find my family, too. Where are they?"

Snape sighed extensively, as if to delay his answer to me. He still didn't look me in the eye. "They haven't been alive for a long time, Jena."

His words crushed my heart. That tiny spark of hope I'd felt, just crumbled into nothing with that one sentence. I turned and let my hands grab my hair.

How could they already be dead when I'd never even known them? Why had Evan never told me this? Surely he knew. He must've known. He probably even knew before Snape did.

Wait a minute...

My breath caught as I turned to face my teacher once more. He still refused to look back.

No...

"Did they..." I swallowed hard and tried again, "Did they kill them?"

Snape's eyes flicked upwards only for a second, but I could see the discomfort in them. It told me enough.

"No..." The word wormed its way out of my mouth as I breathed.

Snape threw his hands in the air in a dismissive gesture. "Look, you know what they wanted with you. You were a project. They couldn't risk your parents finding you. Or worse, you finding them."

An invisible hand held my throat, yet I still managed to push the words out, "They killed them? They killed my parents? Who?"

Snape looked up at me. "It doesn't matter. They're gone. Forget it."

I flinched when my own hand slammed down on the desk. "It matters to me. Who was it?"

Snape stared at me for a long time. Then he seemed to decide I deserved an answer. "Evan Rosier."

My heart skipped about five beats and my legs gave way underneath me. I broke down. Completely and utterly broke down.

Evan Rosier had killed my parents. The man I'd always trusted, the man who I'd looked up to like a father. He'd killed them.

No, no, no...

All those times he'd told me they couldn't find my parents. They were all lies. All this time, he'd lied to me. I couldn't believe it.

I struggled to breathe, as tears poured down my cheeks. Black spots appeared in front of my eyes. My head shook left and right, but it couldn't change the truth.

Lies... They were all lies!

I barely noticed it when Snape picked me up from the floor and put me down on a chair. He crouched down in front of me.

"Jennifer Bates! Listen to me very carefully."

I heaved in another breath, but turned my eyes towards him to show that I was listening.

"Evan Rosier was a Death Eater. You've already figured out that Death Eaters aren't exactly good people. You should've expected this, it is nothing new. Jena! Pull yourself together!"

I gasped when Snape grabbed my shoulders and roughly shook me.

"If there's one thing you've learned from the Death Eaters, it's how to survive."

My eyes squeezed shut and I held my breath in an attempt to calm down. As soon as my voice would work again, I whispered, "They also told me to kill anyone who opposes me."

"Yes, well, fortunately for you, Rosier is already dead." Snape stood up and looked down on me. "There's nothing you can do about it. Move on."

Even through my pain, I could tell there was more behind his words. He didn't just say them, he felt them. He felt the same pain I was feeling. The pain of loss.

"Is that what you did?" I said, challenging him.

Snape's eyes snapped back to me and narrowed. "I'm trying. I suggest you do the same."

After I left the dungeons, I went to my dorm and straight to bed. I didn't want to talk to anyone. I didn't want to face anyone. I pulled the covers over my head to hide from the world.

He lied to me. I couldn't get the words out of my head. All this time, I'd trusted him. I'd been mourning him for weeks. All this time I thought he was the only one in the world who wanted what's best for me, and now...

He killed my parents...

"Jena?"

I held my breath as if pretending not to be there, and grabbed the covers tightly so that Hani couldn't pull them off me. Her footsteps slowly came closer, while I willed her to go away. When she stood next to my bed, she put her hand on my back.

"I know it's hard."

Tears pricked my eyes. She had no idea. She couldn't possibly know how I felt.

"I can't even imagine what it must feel like losing what you thought was your family like that."

A sob escaped my mouth. She didn't even know how close to the truth she was. And yet so far away.

"But you've got a new family now," said Hani, sitting down on the bed next to me. "We're all here for you. We're all willing to help you. If you just let us."

My grip on the sheets loosened. Hani must've heard it, because she slowly pulled them off me so that she could see my face.

"They lied to me," I sobbed.

"Oh, Jena..."

"They killed my parents."

Hani's eyes widened with shock and she pulled me into a hug. "I'm so sorry, Jena."

"I trusted him. He was like a dad to me. But he killed my parents and then told me he couldn't find them." It was difficult to speak through heaves and sobs, and I wasn't sure Hani caught everything. But it didn't matter. Never in my life had I felt so miserable before. I'd be forever grateful to Hani for being here for me, so that I didn't have to feel miserable on my own. "I don't know what to do."

"Yes, you do." Hani let go and threw me a sad smile. "You're strong, Jena. You might need some help, but you can move on from this. You just need to... Well, you just need to fight back."