ɪ'ʟʟ ᴋᴇᴇᴘ ᴍʏ ᴅɪsᴛᴀɴᴄᴇ, ғᴀʀ ᴀᴡᴀʏ ᴀs ɪ ᴄᴀɴ

15

Third POV

Aliciel look at the garden through her room window. They're on summer break as well moving on to the next grade. She feels suffocated at the Blacker Dukedom.

Aliciel sigh as she stood up and headed towards the library. After she open the door, she encounter a familiar figure.

The head maid of the household, Helen.

Her eyes widen at what Helen is carrying. She is carrying a rabbit plush. A cute doll. But it looks old and she just sew the broken part.

"Helen?" Aliciel asked with a raised eyebrow as she spoke the head maid's name.

Helen notice her presence and quickly bow. "Good day, Lady Aliciel." she greeted her politely.

Aliciel walk towards her and look at the rabbit. "I never know you have a daughter? Or granddaughter?" she asked, indicating the doll.

"Ah, this? It is yours, Milady." she answered with a warm smile as Aliciel's eyes widen in confusion since she never receive such thing.

"Mine...?" she asked, confused. She was so sure that it isn't hers, at all.

"Yes." Helen pat the doll. "You used to carry it around when you're 1 year old." there's a hint of sadness when Helen said that much to Aliciel's curiosity.

"How come I never knew? Who gave that to me?" she asked, completely lost at the conversation.

".....His Grace... gave it to you." the moment Helen answer that, Aliciel's eyes widen in surprise.

"What? My father?" she asked, waiting for Helen's answer. Since Helen work at the Dukedom for more than 30 years, she must knew something.

Helen nodded with a sad smile. "This doll, is the first ever gift that His Grace gave to Lady Aliciel. There's one book that Lady Aliciel kept and love to read. It's a fairy tale about a few rabbit. Milady always pointed at the white rabbit one and the Duke notice that and he search with all his might a doll that's similar with the rabbit on the storybook."

Aliciel never imagined that her father try his best to search a similar doll by just looking at the storybook. Her father that is intimidating and cold.

"W-what do you mean by all this?" she asked as a hint of desperation appeared to know. "I-I don't understand...!"

Helen look at her sadly. "...Milady, your mother tried to burn this doll."

Her eyes widen at the shocking information that she thought she would never heard all of her life.

"T-tell me more! Why did my mother marry father? Why did she try to burn my favourite doll if she loves me!?"

Helen regret telling her. Everything would've been better if Aliciel choose ignorance. Sometimes, ignorance is the best thing to avoid unwanted situations.

"...Aleandra Blacker." Helen croaked out the name of Aliciel's mother.

"..she's a cruel woman."

From then on, Aliciel's world start to surround her again and let her think twice more about her family.

What did she miss? What's missing on her memories?

Helen hesitated to tell more but Aliciel's eyes demand for an explanation and no room for argument.

"...After she comes into the dukedom, she treat everyone worse than a trash. She love jewelries, wealth, dresses more than anything. She often spend a lot of the Dukedom's money even though it didn't really affect the finances. But she cut every worker's payment if they talk back or just have a different idea than her. She was violent, throwing tantrum woman." there's a slight of hatred on her eyes making Aliciel more confused by the situation.

It's not like Aliciel's been lied to, she just didn't know her mother's nature before her birth.

"...The Duke never liked her. When she gave birth to Lady Aliciel, she was very happy. But that happiness turned into obsession. It's true that the late Duchess loves Milady but... When the Duke bought this doll for Milady and Milady starts to take it everywhere, that irritates her that the doll was taking your time. So she tried to burn it." she paused, waiting for Aliciel if she said something but she didn't and Helen take that as a sign to continue.

"The Duke was furious but he decided to let it slip. When you turned 5, your mother fell ill. There was one time when she tried to make you eat one of her medicine and the Duke beat her for it because if Milady eat the medicine, Milady might die because of the high pressure. But I don't think that violence is the answer because the Duke is getting more and more violent. He was just trying to save you."

". . ."

"...Yes, the late Duchess truly loves Milady. But it's not a healthy love. She tried to hurt Milady in many ways. Unconsciously, Milady and the Duke grew apart from each other because of her. Even when she was sick, she tried to make Milady stay awake all day and Milady catch a cold because she said that if Milady doesn't stay up, she will die. The Duke once again, got very mad about it and in exchange, he gives her rotten food. Milady's mother was too afraid that Milady would love someone else beside her. She was scared that she would be replaced."

Aliciel's eyes widen. She is loss for words. She truly have some piece of memories that her mother threaten her that she will die if Alicel didn't want to follow what she wants.

It's all a misunderstanding.

"The Duke notice that you hate him. So he acted like that. I know that he also use violence against Milady's mother, but Milady's mother is also a violent person. I-I just wanted to say that.." Helen grab Aliciel's hand as she put the doll into her arms carefully.

"The Duke truly love Milady."

Guilt, anger, pity, and happiness all dwelled inside Aliciel. She's guilty that she doesn't want to understand her father more, she's angry with her father for hitting her mother, she pity his father that he has to live his life being hated by his own daughter, and she's happy to know that he loves her nonetheless.

A sigh of relief escaped her mouth as she felt like a heavy burden suddenly vanish inside her.

In the end, Aliciel is a daughter that is both loved by her parents.