Dissonance - Book One

the beginning

"Perhaps they are not stars in the sky but rather openings where our loved ones shine down to let us know they are happy."

My mom gave me a small angel statue, with that saying written on it, after the accident. On nights when I would wake up sweating from a nightmare and couldn't catch my breath, I would rub the angel's wings with my thumb and repeat the saying over and over again until I drifted back to sleep. I can't help but think of it now as I gaze out at the infinite twinkling stars that surround the ship on every side. Perhaps there are so many because so many lives have been lost over the last week and so many more will be lost in the next couple more. I wonder how long it will take for the universe to be filled with all those people whose lights have been extinguished far too soon. Suddenly the stars don't seem so bright now that they hold the souls of all mankind.

"I'm a friend," he says now for the third time, bringing me out of my trance. "I'm here to help," he repeats, trying to calm my fears, but Aveline's warning of friends and foes is in the forefront of my mind, reminding me to be wary of his motives. I need to be cautious, but at the same time, I'm acutely aware of the fact that I don't have anyone to rely on anymore. It's just me now. I will have to give a small amount of trust to someone in order to survive. Aveline had confidence in this man that he could get me onto the ship and he followed through with his end of the bargain. At the very least, I should tell him about her, but I'll have to be gentle with my words. She loved him after all.

"She's gone," I blurt out. So much for being gentle, but I couldn't listen to him tell me one more time that everything is going to be okay.

"Who?" he asks, with a confused look on his face.

"Aveline. She's dead."

"I'm so sorry." He looks down at his lap for a minute trying to collect his thoughts, perhaps trying not to cry in front of me. "She was incredibly smart and loyal to the resistance. She will be missed."

His response is mechanical, not what I would expect from someone who was close to her, let alone loved her. Maybe I misjudged him and who he was to her. So much is uncertain, but the one thing I am sure of, is that I am utterly and completely alone, without my sister, my parents, Wyler, Kelly, Lex. I will have to navigate this new world, this new future, without the people that I love by my side.

We sit next to one another in silence for quite a while until he tells me that it is safe to walk around. I unbuckle my belt and rise slowly from my seat, unsure if I will float straight up to the ceiling. He chuckles at my uneasiness.

"You're fine," he says. "The ship is equipped with gravity control. It allows us to walk around as if we were on Earth. I think you'll find this ship to be quite impressive actually. It has every modern convenience you can imagine: a gym, salon, spa, yoga studio, the list goes on and on. There's even a hospital. They spared no expense."

Of course they didn't, I think to myself. It was built by a government backed by billionaires who were plotting their own escape while throwing the rest of humanity to the wolves. Practicing yoga while billions of people die hardly seems very Namaste.

"You might enjoy one of our viewing windows," he continues, pointing towards a large glass panel in front of which rests a bench filled with cushions and pillows: a window seat into the galaxy. They truly did spare no expense.

I find a spot in between the excessive amounts of fluffy pillows and sit down on the bench, staring out through the glass into the dark abyss. The man follows and stands behind me. I wonder if this is how the rest of the trip will be, with him as my shadow.

"How long will it take?" I ask the man whose name I still don't know. Maybe it's better that way. The less I know of these people, the less it will hurt when another one loses their life trying to save mine.

"About six months."

I nod in understanding and amazement at the journey that still lies ahead. Aveline was right when she said that this is just the beginning.

"What's out there?" I ask, more aloud to myself than to the man. I look out into the endless universe trying to imagine my new life on another planet. Never again will I see the mountains or the ocean or the blue sky. Never again will I stare up at the moon wondering what it would be like to float in space, looking back down upon the Earth. There will be a new moon perhaps, and new surroundings and an answer to the question of the mysteries of the universe, that I never really wanted the answer to in the first place. I think back to when I was younger and I wished to be an astronaut. Silly girl. So foolish and naïve.

"Well," he begins, but then pauses. I can tell he's trying to decide how much he should reveal. By now, I'm used to half-truths and conflicting information, the full story being withheld. If he wants to keep me in the dark or sugarcoat the truth, it's fine for now. I don't like the way it tastes, but I'll take what I can get.

"The Colonization Project started many, many, years ago, so they'll have an infrastructure set up for us."

"The Colonization Project?"

"Yes, everything that's happening now was put into motion long ago, before you and I were born. We're just lucky enough to be a part of it."

Lucky isn't exactly the word I would use. He smiles and it occurs to me that to him it is a privilege to be a part of this mission. There are people who would kill to be in my shoes right now and I'm moping about. I know I should try to change my attitude, but it's hard to be optimistic when you have nothing and no one to live for.

"How many people are there?" I inquire, trying to seem interested. The least I can do is engage in polite conversation after making it so difficult for him to save my life. He was just doing what he was told after all, and I'm sure he risked a lot by doing so. Plus, six months is a long time to have nothing but my torturous thoughts to keep me company. I could use a friend, or at least someone to lend an ear.

"About 500," he replies.

"That many?" I say, taken aback by the number. "Who are they?'

"An assortment of people: scientists, doctors, biologists, workers who went up years ago to build our new home."

Home, I think. I can't imagine anywhere feeling like home ever again. How could it? Home isn't a place, it's a feeling of being with those you love, and they're all gone now.

"Plus those who paid extra to evacuate prior to the disasters being initiated. Not everyone wanted to witness that level of..."

"Death," I finish his sentence.

"I was going to say, destruction, but your word works too."

Cowards, I think to myself.

"And of course, he will be there to greet you."

"He?" I turn to the man in confusion. He has my full attention now.

"Well yes," he chuckles. "Did you think the General would miss your arrival?"

"Who?" I ask in bewilderment.

"General Attwood," he says. "Your brother."