The Perfect Girl

25

"But she's afraid, Of the fantasy her mind has made,"

In a way, Hiba began to recover after that.

There was a period of many months during which we were both in just about the same place, though Hiba was more intense in her emotion, which was to be expected.

I think the first time I saw Hiba make a joke and actually laugh because she found something amusing was a few months after the funeral. She was talking to her brothers and Shuayb told a story about one of the people he met on the plane with Hana when they were on their honeymoon.

Hiba started smiling again.

But sometimes, I'd find her crying, clutching a picture of her father or just burying her face in a pillow. I had these moments sometimes as well. Hiba always hugged me when I did, usually crying along with me.

But now we talked about him without breaking down. We laughed at the old stories that included him, and Hiba could stand the mention of him.

And with this time and this grief came a sort of bond, built on nothing but seeing each other in our weakest moments.

The thing about Hiba, though, was that I could never seem to figure her out completely. Every time I thought I knew her, she'd say something, or do something, or just fall completely inwards, and surprise me.

Today had been a good day, now that I thought about it. Hiba was laughing and joking and happy, actually cheerful, something that was contagious.

"Khalid?"

I turned around to find Hiba standing there, smiling at me.

"Yeah?"

"What are you doing?"

I was just sitting on the couch, scrolling through some texts.

"Nothing much, why?"

"No reason," she sat down beside me, rested her head on my shoulder.

She leaned on me a lot.

I didn't mind it, but I'm not sure why Hiba had always been one to lean on people. Almost every time I saw her she was leaning on either one of her brothers, her mother, or her father. It was a rare thing to see her sitting up straight.

She also hugged people a lot, something she did not do with me. She hugged her family a lot, but not Jana or my mother or me or really anyone who was not a blood-relation. Another thing I didn't quite understand.

"I have an exam this Friday," Hiba groaned, "And I am not prepared."

I smiled, "You're never prepared for anything."

"Hey!" she protested, "Shush."

"It's true," I shrugged.

"I'm going to fail!" she exclaimed.

"Now that, I don't believe." I stated, "You always say that, and then you pass with flying colours. Haven't you ever heard of the positive thinking?"

She laughed, "I like to convince myself I'm going to fail. That way, if I pass, I'll be like, wow, I'm amazing, and if I don't, then was only expected."

I shook my head, "Again, the power of positive thinking."

"Positive thinking, my foot," she scoffed, paused, "I went to the graveyard yesterday."

I looked at her, waiting for elaboration.

"I think I needed it," she said, smiled a little, "I didn't cry."

Another pause, "I think I'll be okay." she looked at me, caught my eyes, "Do you think I'll be okay?"

There was a painful sort of innocence in her eyes now.

Hiba hardly ever looked like this, so innocent. She was open, but not vulnerable, and there is little in this world more vulnerable than true innocence.

"Yes," I murmured, "I think you'll be okay, love."

"Khalid?" she said, still looking at me.

"Ye--"

She cut me off.

She kissed me.