Band of Brothers Imagines

Scars - Lewis Nixon x Reader

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You slowly blinked your eyes open, dreading spending the third day in a row lying there in the uncomfortable hospital bed, just passing the time by staring at the ceiling and trying to ignore the immense pain. You tried to focus on happy memories to distract yourself, like meeting Nix for the first time, and the way he smiled at you when he shook your hand so warmly. Closing your eyes again, you saw so vividly the moment he told you that Kathy was divorcing him. You knew you shouldn't have been pleased, but you were elated. Two years of unspoken love between you could finally come out into the open.

And then came the lottery. You'd been chosen to receive a ticket home and, although you were sad to be parted temporarily from Nix, you were so excited to finally be returning home to your family. However, it wasn't to be. Not once had you been injured in combat, but the jeep you were travelling in was involved in a crash, during what should've been those tranquil days as the Allies basked in their victory and Europe began to enjoy peace after so long. As a consequence of misfortune, you were bed bound, burns all down your left side, as the jeep had caught fire in the crash.

You were too exhausted to form tears, but inside you were weeping. The doctors had told you that, although you'd fully recover the use of your limbs, you'd be left with severe scars from the burns. Nix had been telling you at every given opportunity for the past four months that he loved you, and you had faith in the fact that he'd stand by you. Despite your lack of confidence, he'd made you feel so beautiful, but not even Nix could make you feel that way now. Even Nix couldn't find you attractive anymore, or so you thought, and you hated the idea of him feeling obliged to stay with you.

"Hi," a familiar voice shook you out of your thoughts and you craned your neck, seeing Nix standing at the foot of your bed.

"Hi," you replied weakly, motioning for him to take the chair by your bed.

"How are you feeling," you knew that he was just being caring, but it was impossible to prevent a sarcastic laugh escaping.

"Oh, I'm having the time of my life," you smiled, showing him that it was okay and you didn't mean to be rude. He reached out for your hand, withdrawing when you pulled away.

"Please don't do that."

"Don't do what?" you queried, knowing full well what he meant.

"Don't shut me out, I want to help," Nix's voice shook, and when your eyes met his, you realised there were tears forming in them.

"I know you mean well, but perhaps it's just better if you leave now," you tried to ignore the lump forming in your throat and to keep your voice as even as possible. "And don't come back." Nix's tears were falling now, and he wiped them furiously away, silently refusing to budge. "Go."

"No, I won't leave you. I'll never leave you," he managed to speak, reaching forward and managing to grab your hand, despite your efforts to shake him off.

"But I don't want you," the emotion had overpowered your exhaustion and you were also now crying, silent salty tears streaming down your cheeks.

"I know you don't mean that. You think you're setting me free by doing this, but you don't understand that I don't care if you're going to be scarred. You'll always be the most beautiful person I've ever seen," Nix was gently stroking his thumb over the back of your hand which, although you wouldn't admit it, was helping to soothe you.

"You're just saying that to make me feel better," you grumbled, preferring to inspect the clinical cleanliness of the wall opposite your bed than to look at Nix. He didn't argue back, knowing that for the moment there was nothing he could say that would persuade you otherwise. You lost track of how long the two of you were sat there in silence, you staring at the wall, and Nix's eyes firmly on you, your hand still in his. Thoughts of the future overwhelmed you, and you began to wonder if you'd been too quick to dismiss a future with Nix. After all, he was here, and you knew he was sincere in his words.

"I'm scared," you whispered, unable to speak any louder as the lump in your throat built again.

"I know," Nix moved to sit on the bed, his hand still in yours, and used his other hand to gently wipe away your tears. "But we're in this together. I know you'll be here for a while yet, but I can't wait to go back to the States with you."

"To Nixon, New Jersey?" you laughed a little, and Nix delighting in hearing his favourite sound once again.

"To Nixon, New Jersey," Nix smiled at you, a grin so full of love that you knew you were each other's, eternally.