Letter Nine

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Dear Phoebe,

The start of high school was
weird for everyone.
Even those that had been popular
in middle school.
Things were different now and no one knew what to do.
Stick with the friends from before?
Or make a whole new crew?
It was a mix of both for me.
I kept Rachel and Oscar, but I lost you.

We still wore our friendship bracelets everyday as if nothing had happened.
I thought of taking it off
after the day of our first and last fight.
But my wrist had never been bare
since the day you tied it on me.
It was the same for you too.
Maybe that's why we never took it off.
Maybe that's why we kept on wearing them. Maybe's are all I have left
now that there's no you and me.

There was hope in our
friendship bracelets.
A promise of something rekindling.

But that all died when in tenth grade
you called me a f-

I can't even write the word.

I was never that.
I was never gay.
But you would've known that
had you bothered to stay.
You would've known that
had you bothered to listen.

The day you called me a f____t was the day I cut my bracelet off.

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