Life Of Reality

Memories of Past

I remember the smell of detergent.

The one you always used. The kind that didn't disappear after a few days of clothing being washed.

I remember the sight of smiles.

Making jokes and acting silly with each other. Never caring what others thought of our humor.

I remember walking together.

The hallways were always our trails. Amoung other peers, we enjoyed each others company.

I remember the day we finished.

Our last time walking through the school. Our last time sharing amazing moments and finishing school together.

I don't remember when things got bad.

Her, growing busy with college. You, making amazing friends. Both of you growing and spreading your wings.

I don't remember when I became an anchor.

I always held onto you both, like a child holding its mother. Keeping you from the reach of LIFE. Of being an adult.

I don't remember hurting you.

It was either New Years Eve or 4th of July. I said some things I can't remember saying. The words of you saying I've hurt you. Made you cry.

I don't remember wanting your affection, your love.

December 21. You spoke of things I knew you'd say. I'll never forget how you made me see the world. How you cared and loved me when I thought bad about myself.

The days pass by, and so does my memories of you. I can no longer call you as a "best friend" anymore. I could no longer tell you all the stuff I do, or have hidden from everyone. Life just doesn't feel real to me anymore. You were there when I couldn't tell my family because of how things have gotten between them.

You were my anchor, and I have made you lose your light. If it weren't for me, you'd all be happier. I wouldn't have become someone toxic. Maybe then, I would've disappeared without hurting anyone. Probably would've made things much simpler.

You were my Best Friends. My greatest Gifts.

And now, I have said my final goodbyes. I may have silenced the conversation. I may have not said goodbye. But I do wish you the best. I wish her the best. You both deserve to have a life. Without me being a hassle or an anchor. Good luck. Have a safe and swell life.

Sincerely,
Єcнσ 𐌼ιʓʋκι