More Than Gold

Please read

Hi, guys. Hope you're all well. I just wanted to take a little bit of your time to address an issue that has been weighing on my chest.

A couple chapters earlier I mentioned Kaveh wasn't quite as in-touch with his religion. Since they were to be married, Dahlia was encouraging him to get to learn about Islam.

In that chapter, a sister in the comments pointed out, "shouldn't she marry someone who is already religious instead of trying to change someone who isn't?"

My answer at that time was, "this is what one should be striving for ideally, but it doesn't always happen in real life."

In real life, it is very difficult to find someone who shares your level of Deen. Dahlia already had her heart attached to Kaveh, despite their differences, and she was just trying to encourage him to develop some interest in religion since that's important to her.

Then the following day, I heard a story about a girl who married a guy who wasn't religious (actually, the guy was hardcore atheist), and she too like Dahlia attempted to get him interested in religion, and prior marriage he indulged in it too. But after they got married, he kind of stopped trying.

The couple began to face a lot of issues (not all religion related) and eventually considered divorce.

Even though Kaveh isn't atheist and I portrayed him as someone who is very honest about his feelings and will not just pretend to be interested in something for his own benefit, I couldn't disregard the similarities between the real couple and my fictional one. The story bothered me a lot. It, I don't know, kind of felt like a sign to me? It leads me to think maybe I shouldn't have romanticised D&K's situation the way I did.

Yes, maybe the way I portrayed D&K is realistic, but I also know there are a lot of impressionable young girls reading this book.

I try to be very careful about how I represent Islam, and I also try to write according to what's accurate in my reality - and the two don't always coincide.

I want to point out that this book is more culturally focused than religion, and please, please don't use it as a guide for how a Muslim should act.

I try to adhere my content to Islamic values as much as possible, but at times I also give in to my societal standards. How Dahlia reacted to Kaveh's disinterest in Islam is very real in my reality, but doesn't mean I encourage it.

I strongly believe we should look for a spouse who already has sound knowledge in religion, will help us become better Muslims, and will treat us as per Allah's command.

I plan to continue the book as is. I'm not going to alter what I wrote already or let this affect how I plan the future chapters, but I also don't want to misguide anybody.

XO,
Kat

Special note: This post led to further discussions in the comments section and I just wanted to clarify a couple of points:

-Dahlia isn't trying to 'fix' Kaveh. I showed that they were having these conversations BEFORE marriage because it's important to do so. She understands where he stands on religion, and she is comfortable with it. But of course she is going to encourage him to be better.

-Not everyone is on the same level of Deen, and that's okay. But our religion does advise us to look at a person's Deen first, hence why I focused so much on the fact that this book is culture focused.