chapter 12

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the next day
miley did not leave her room once.
not to pee,not to eat,not to talk to noah.

noah on the other hand was trying to keep himself distracted all day.
but all he could think of was miley and how he fucked up

he has never seen her so mad.
she wasn't even mad though. she was hurt and embarrassed.

i mean most girls would love to be ripped off of a stage by their wrist,in front of everyone by the one and only noah flynn.

but miley wasn't most girls
she's different
and noah knows that.
she might be your typical blonde, beautiful, good body, pretty face high school girl. but her soul was different. she actually had a sense of humor. she was always kind. her looks didn't control her personality. she didn't think she was better than anyone.
she was of course the only one that felt that way.
every girl could only dream of looking like miley
which miley never understood
why?
cause she didn't think she was good enough. or pretty enough.
i mean if you see a pretty girl and you find out she doesn't like herself,you'd think, why? why doesn't she like herself,id kill to look that way.
but just like every teenage girl,she didn't think she was good enough.
but whatever,she's always been trapped in her own head and thoughts anyways.

she kind of felt bad for yelling at noah.
but he did rip her off the stage. and yell at her.
noah has had a past with being "aggressive"
miley knew that. but he was never like that with her. he was never mean to her,he never yelled at her,he never even made fun of her just as a joke the way he does to lee.

he has always had a soft spot for that girl.

around 4 pm
she finally got out of her bed after being awake for 6 hours and spending all of them crying her eyes out over last night. 
she went up to her vanity and sat down
she looked at her self in the mirror
she rubbed her puffy eyes and groaned
she started to brush her hair
and she threw her brush across the room
and she sat on her floor picking at her carpet crying.

she thought to herself:

why am i even so sad about this? he did this. but i yelled at him. but he slammed his fist right against the trailer right next to my face. he scared me. he embarrassed me. but he was just trying to protect me. but protect me from what? from kissing boys? please. at least i don't make out with every guy in sight. like he does with girls. but he's trying to change. i'm not stupid though. i know when i'm sleeping he leaves and goes to his hookup spot and does whatever it is that he does there. but i don't try and stop him. he's a 17 year old boy, he's horny. not his fault. it's normal. i guess. i'm just so mad at him. but he cares about me. but he could show it in other ways. i love him, and i always will. and i'm grateful for what he's done for me. always will be,i think he knows that. i hope he knows that. but what if he doesn't know that. what if he thinks i don't care. what if he thinks i don't love him,or i'm not grateful,or i don't want to be close to him. noah sucks at showing emotion. he sucks at showing that he cares. he sucks at letting people know he does have a heart. except with me. whether he doesn't care if i know or he thinks he's hiding it and i just see right through him,i don't know. but i do know he's a good person. i wish everyone else could see the noah flynn that i know. he cares. he's sweet. but instead he walks around school with his head held high acting like all he cares about is fucking girls,partying,and football.  there's so much more to him though. i know that. no one else does. i want people to see him  for more than a heartless jock who just so happens to me a man whore. when i look into his eyes i see nothing but a sweet soul who will keep me safe no matter what. but when i see him and that smirk on his face that screams "i'm an asshole" i always laugh when i see it. every single girl at our school falls at noah's feet. only cause they all think he's hot. but he is a person that not everyone can tolerate. he's perfect until he's not anymore. i've known him all my life and i don't think he's ever been in a serious relationship. he has a game he plays. just like every single other hot football player on the team in our school. they make the girl think that they're interested,fuck her,and then just pretend they don't know her. noah tries to hide it from me. i don't know,he probably doesn't want me to think of him in a bad way. but i see right through it. ugh whatever.

she got off of her floor and walked up to her door
opened it
she went into the bathroom to brush her teeth and wash her face
she brushed her teeth but didn't even have the energy to wash her face
she left the bathroom
she heard footsteps coming up the stairs
she tried to walk to her room to avoid whoever was coming up the stairs

she heard someone get to the top of the stairs and clear their throat
she turned her head
it was noah
she made eye contact with him
he had that face. the one where you could tell he was sorry and he wanted to make things right
but she looked down and she turned her head back around
she opened her bedroom door and shut it behind her

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