Chapter 48

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That fire flashes behind his eyes again. His hand on my wrist loosens, and I take it as the opportunity to wrap both my hands around his neck.

I pull him in closer, so that he stands between my legs. I bring his face down to mine, so our lips are a breath apart, less than an inch away.

"Jade," he whispers, his breath fanning against my mouth.

"Is this a bad idea?" I breathe.

"Yes," he says, closing the gap between us. His lips softly press against mine.

His hands travel down to my waist, bringing me forward so that I'm sitting just on the edge of the washing machine, so that I'm pressed up against him. Hard.

His tongue meets mine, my lips parting for him. His hands trail down my hips, down to my thighs. His hand wraps around my inner thighs, fingers digging into the skin. My hands explore his chest, grabbing at the edge of his shirt and pulling it smoothly off of him.

"Why do you do this to me?" he whispers, using his grip on my thighs to pull me impossibly closer to him.

He kisses my harder, at the same time a hand crawling under my skirt.

I feel hot all over, like the blood in my body is pumping harder than usual, and like it's pumping especially in my underwear.

I start unbuckling his belt. What am I doing? I have no idea what I'm doing. I've never done any of this before. But I want to. I want it so badly I might just pass out from the need.

"Jade?" he says between harsh breaths.

"Yes," I answer, before he can even ask. Because yes, I want him to keep going. Yes, I am ready. And yes, I want it now.

He buries his face in my neck, kissing and sucking on the skin.

His hand tucks under the hem of my panties.

I suck in a sharp breath as he explores the sensitive skin, pressing lightly, slowly delving deeper.

I'm moaning before I can stop myself. I close my eyes, tilting my head back, arching against him.

He makes a low sound from the back of his throat. I can't think about how seeing me like this makes him feel, because all I can think about is how good he's making me feel.

Until we are interrupted.

I've never felt fury like this before. I'm not even embarrassed – legs wide open on the washing machine with a boy's fingers inside me – as multiple students walk in.

I have to bite my lip to hold back the anger of being left on the edge. Left unsatisfied.

They don't seem to notice us much, other than giving Darcy a once over from being shirtless. He's so broad, I would have been mostly covered.

Darcy steps back away from me and I pull my skirt back into position. I notice a scar on his stomach as he pulls his shirt back over his head. His face is red, as I'm sure mine is.

I want to know how he feels now. What he's thinking.

Is what we're doing meaningless to him? Or is there some actual feelings behind these urges? I know there is for me, as much I hate to admit it.

"How did you get that scar?" I say, breaking the silence. I reach out to trace my hand over his shirt where I saw the scar, but he pulls back.

"It's complicated," he says, leaning against the wall.

I jump off the washing machine and stand beside him. At the same time, we both slide our backs down the wall until we're sitting on the floor.

"Everything about us is complicated," I say, not being able to come up with anything else.

He smiles lightly, like he appreciates my effort. "My mum," he says.

I try not to show the shock on my face, I try to seem calm as he tells me how his mother gave him that deep scar below his left rib. "What did she do?"

"We were fighting about something. She was cooking and she was holding a knife..." he trails off and I can see the moments replaying in his head. He winces. "She sliced me across the side. She bought me presents every day for months afterwards."

"How old were you?"

"Eight."

I bite my lip.

"I still wish you could've met her," he says. "I... it was complicated but..."

"She's your mother. You love her."

"But is it right to love someone that hurt you?" His eyes meet mine. "This wasn't a one-off occasion... she was unwell."

"She hurt you, a lot?" I whisper.

"It wasn't her fault," he sighs.

Now I realise why he needs attention from older women.

"What happened to her?" I ask quietly.

"She took her own life. She didn't even say goodbye."

I don't know what to say to that. So I just lean into him, resting my chin on his shoulder. He puts his arm around me and we sit like that for a while, like two puzzle pieces perfectly interlaced.

I look up at him, through our tangle of limbs. "I'm sorry you had to go through that. If I could take all that pain away from you, I would." I didn't realise rich people had problems. I always agreed with Ariana: whoever said money can't solve your problems, must not have had enough money to solve them.

"If we erased all our pain, we would be blank canvasses of people," he says softly.

"Is that Shakespeare?"

"No, that's me," he laughs breathily.

"You should be a poet," I smile, glancing up at his long eyelashes, his perfectly red lips, his high cheekbones.

"You're so beautiful," he whispers, without thinking. He bites his lip, and I know that he didn't mean to say that out loud. I love it.

"Really?" I say. I wonder how much I can milk it before he takes it back.

"You have no idea what you do to me."

I start blushing, and I have to look away.

He cups my chin, bringing my face back to his. His eyes drift down to my lips. He leans in, brushing his lips against mine softly. Both his hands come up to cup my face, he lightly presses his lips against mine, not passionately (like before) but gently. Lovingly.

"Darcy," I breathe between kisses.

"Yes, Jade," he breathes back.

"What are we doing?"

"I don't know," he sighs, "but I don't want to stop."

Butterflies swarm my stomach.

The washing machine beeps, reminding us to get off our asses and finish the job. I stand up and Darcy groans, rolling his eyes.

"Can't we just pay someone to do it for us," he jokes.

"I don't have money to throw around like you do," I laugh, lips pressed together as I take our clothes to the row of driers.

We finish our washing, then we walk back to our separate dorms. 


________________

hehe 

more to come 

xoxo

aurora

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