Chapter 10: Ilse's diary

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First person POV: (Y/n)

   Three and a quarter years later. Year 850.

Departing for yet another expedition, the 49th to be exact. I've been with the Scouts for a bit over three years. I must admit, I'm still that cold bitch I used to be but more selectively, and people like Petra and Hange see that non-bitch side of me more often.

Over the years Erwin has realized that, even though, I and Levi don't get along inside the Walls we have near perfect teamwork outside them, so separating us into different squads is something he refuses to do.

Levi known as the Humanity's Strongest Soldier and I...well, I still am the Euphoria I used to be but with a different propose now. People who have heard stories about the work we do outside the Walls call our little power 'duo' the Humanity's Euphoria. Who came up with this nickname, I don't know and I don't care either. Seems like neither does Levi. I guess we're both cold hearted assholes.

One more thing I've adapted to, besides being stuck with my name from the Underground but now it being treated as a name of a hero, is that I get absolutely no sleep, what so ever, before expeditions. I good as that stopped trying after a few times. Another thing that hasn't changed about me is the hood. Citizens only truly know me by my hood, if I'd one day take it off and marched here they'd think I was some new requite. Yeah, the years have been busy and fucking stressful. I've distracted myself from the stress by sometimes getting wasted. I know most people in the Regiment fuck around to relieve the stress but for me that's off the table, so I've adapted to less healthy way to cope. I try not to stumble to that level often when I have to get wasted to forget anything but it happens, just as it did the night before. So I'm here, tired and with a massive fucking hangover and the citizens' screeching and yelling isn't helping my headache.

"I can't stand waiting," I hear Hange whine. From my spot behind Levi, I roll my eyes and shake my head before they continue, "Hey Levi!"

"The answer's no," Levi cuts them off before they could even say anything. To be honest we all know what they want.

"I hadn't even said anything yet," Hange says, more like asks and looks at Levi like a lost child.

"You want me to help you capture a Titan, right?" Levi says to Hange without even looking at them. "I don't care to go to that kind of trouble," he goes on. Hange, heard the reply, just turns to Mike, "What about you, Mike? You want in?" they ask.

I tune out Hange's rambling. They're a nice person and all but their Titan obsession can be a bit overwhelming at times.

"The 49th expedition beyond the walls now begins," Erwin's voice booms over all of us, making me flinch with the headache. I am now convinced that I should have not drank yesterday. Well we learn from our mistakes, right?

"Advance!"

***

I don't know if I should be worried or not. Hange, again, is trying to convince Erwin to capture a Titan. It's not going to happen, it hasn't happened in the three years I've been here and it probably won't happen anytime soon either.

I'm tending to the horses, just as Hange emerges from Erwin's tent, Erwin before them and poor Moblit after Hange. I truly feel bad for Moblit at times. And just as Erwin's out of ear reach, Oluo decides to open his mouth. I don't hear what's he's saying but it must be bad as Hange grabs his collar and raises him from the ground.

I blow out a breath as Petra and Moblit start telling Hange that what they're doing is going a bit too far. Honestly, Oluo needs to be put to his place every once in a while. His need to imitate Levi is getting out of hand. I'm pretty sure Levi, himself, knows of Oluo's imitating as well but if he does he hasn't said shit, which is weird but who cares.

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