Thoughts of You • One Shots

End of my world 🧅

"Damn that must have been pretty traumatic." Meredith just got thrown in the hall after the bomb exploded. Having the guy explode to mist along with two of the bomb squad.

"Yeah I bet, a shame tho, the guy was pretty cute." I turned my head and looked at Scarlett with a scoff. "Really?" I asked in disbelief. "Oh come on don't get jealous, you're cuter than him." She tried to redeem herself. "Damn right I am." I whispered and turned my attention back to the TV.

I watched as Izzie and Cristina guide a shock-stricken Meredith to shower, being careful and gentle.

"Stop pouting." Scarlett said, me realizing she's been looking at me instead of watching the show. "I'm not pouting." I denied. "See you're doing it more now." She reached for my chin and let me face her. "You're cute." She grinned and straddled my lap, hooking her arms on my neck. "I love you." Kiss. "I love you." Kiss. "I love yooooouu." This time I pulled on her neck to deepen the kiss. "Damn it." I finally gave in my faux jealousy.

She chuckled and laid her head on my chest. "You're so easy you know." She said against my neck. "Just watch the damn show." I said and she shifted on top of me, laying sideways so she could watch.

"I can't... I can't remember... Our last kiss. All I could think about was, I'm gonna die today and I can't remember our last kiss, which is pathetic but the last time we were together and happy, I... Want to be able to remember that. And I can't, Derek. I can't remember it." Meredith looked at him in wonder, still trying to remember, wondering if she ever will.

"I'm glad you didn't die today." He replied as he leaves the door.

"It was a Thursday morning..."

"I wonder when our last kiss is gonna happen." Scarlett spoke up. "There will be no last kiss between us, sweetheart." I said and kissed her head. "But there will be eventually though." She shrugged. "Are you thinking of breaking up?" I asked, looking at me, although her attention is on the TV. "No, never." She answered. "Then there will be no last kiss." She hummed and I pressed her body against mine, hugging her tighter.

"If you knew this was your last day on Earth, how would you want to spend it?" Meredith ended her monologue as did the episode.

She must've felt me looking 'cause then she turned to face me. Our eyes connecting instantly, green eyes meeting mine, making the both of us smile. "What?" She asked softly, her eyes shifting between my eyes to my lips. "Answer the question." I whispered.

She let out a breath and went back to her position before. "Well, I don't really know." She sighed. Her hand reaching for my jaw and caressing it down to my neck. "If this is my last day on Earth, I would want to be here. Just me lying on your chest, and you holding me. There's no else I'd rather be really." She said.

"That's really nice." I said and pulled her closer if that's possible. She hummed and looked at me. "How about you?" She asked. "Do you have all day?" I grinned. "Apparently, it's my last so I don't think so." She quips and we laugh. "Alright. Um. How could I top your answer though? You were all sappy and shit and I'll probably say I'm just gonna go to sleep and let the day pass." I joked, obviously that's not where I'd wanna be or what I'd wanna do.

"Be serious, Y/N." She scolds. I took my time and thought. I closed my eyes and visualized what I would want my day to be. "Is it selfish to say that I'd want to be alone?" I asked. "All my life I've been surrounded by people, telling me what to do, what not to do, to do more, do this less. Even when I'm alone, I'm not really, 'cause I'm reminded, it's imprinted in my brain, everything everyone said. There's voices that's nagging and telling on me, controlling me, not allowing me to be free. I'd want to be alone. But I need to be alone with you. You're my breath of fresh air, you're my clarity amidst all the chaos in my head, one look at you and I remember how to breathe." I ended and opened my eyes, only to be met by her teary ones.

"I always knew you were the sappy one." She joked, I chuckled and wiped her cheek just us a single tear fell. "Shut up." I smiled and leaned down, kissing her nose. "Also I think I'd wanna get married to you." I said which granted me the biggest smile I've ever seen. "I think anywhere is great just as long as I kiss you at sunset and get to call you my wife."

Present Day

I watched as Rose walked down the aisle in her baby pink dress as she threw petals above her head like a confetti, giggling as she does. My cheeks hurt from smiling as I watch her sprint the remaining distance and onto her grandmother's lap. Then there she was. Everything seemed to stop and I couldn't hear anything. Not the waves in the ocean, not the chirping of birds, not the background music, just my heart beating out of my chest. She's the most beautiful bride you could ever imagine. I felt it before I realized, tears streaming non-stop onto the floor, trying to keep myself composed as to not breakdown. This is happening and my emotions are getting the best of me. Meanwhile she's walking, all in her glory, smiling and eyes looking right at me. 

The moment she reached the altar, I completely zoned out. Everything was a blur and all I could do was look at her. Marvel at how beautiful she looks. How her eyes tell a million stories, all of them filled with nothing but love.

When I tell you I zoned out, I really zoned out. Next thing I know she says "I do" and all is done but to kiss the bride. I fell down to my knees and the sobs I've been holding finally let themselves out, my pain letting themselves known with broken cries and tears that won't stop. Clutching the Phone to my chest, still with the video playing.

"I pronounce you, Mr. And Mrs. Jost."

The preacher said and everyone erupts into cheers, while a new wave of pain washes over me. I threw the phone into the sand as I watch the sun go down.

"It was supposed to be me! We we're supposed to be married! I- we promised... by the sunset." I screamed, my voice ending to a whisper.

______________________________

Well it's been a while.

How is this?