Love isn't Real

.6.

After the vase incident I excused myself to my room. I didn't want to be down there anymore. Once in my room I change into one of the pairs of pajama pants Hazel got me and a plain shirt. I crawl into the huge bed, get under the covers and fall asleep.

Another day at the restaurant but it was late and father said that some people were coming here for a late night dinner. All the other servers were allowed to go home but me. I had to stay and serve these people. They all said that I at least I would get extra money but they don't know that I don't get money. Father takes all of my tips, tips I barely even get.

I wait at the front for the people to walk in for a few minutes. Father is in his office in the back, he told me that he will be in there until the people leave. The door opens and three men and a two women walked in and my heart dropped. I don't want to do this anymore. I would rather have father beat me. With people not around and father in his office these people can do what they want to me.

The men walk up to me all wearing matching smirks. "Get us a table sweetheart" One says. I grad menus but look up again so I can get the right number when my eyes land on a child. A child. Who would bring a child here? I pick up five menus and a blank piece of paper for the kid. I lead them to a big enough table and start setting the menus down as they sit down. I get to the little boy and he looks up at me with big bright green eyes. I place the paper in front of him and hold out a pencil which he takes with curious eyes. The two woman smile at me and I back away.

One of the guys grab my butt squeezing hard and I jump a little. "What's your name?" He asked. "Declan" I murmur. Suddenly he grabs my hips and pulls me onto him lap and my breath hitches in my throat. I face the kid who draws lines on the paper with a smile. "Dirk what are you doing?" One of the ladies ask with a glare. "Having fun" The man says one of his hands sliding up to my private area.

The little boy puts the pencil down and holds up the paper to me with a huge smile. It was a person with a smile and had my name on the side. "Oh! Hunter did you draw Declan?" The other girl asked with a smile. The boy nods with a giggle. I stare at the drawling tears well in my eyes and I quickly stand up covering my mouth with my hand. "The hell?" The man sneered. I'm never that happy. I won't ever be that happy. The little boy will grow to be happy, he'll have a good life while I'm stuck here. I sob escapes my mouth and my squeeze my eyes shut.
_
"I'm sorry about Declan's behavior" Was all my father said before closing the door. The turns to me with anger in his eyes and I lower my head. "Do you have any idea what you could've done!? You dumb bitch!" He yells. He slaps me and kicks me down. "I-I'm s-sorry" I mumble as tears fall. He doesn't care, he just keeps hurting me, he always hurts me.
~~~~~
I jolt awake, quickly sitting up and looking around the room. Then a knock on the door startles me. I look at the door then slowly get up and walk to the door opening it. Brian stands there hands behind his back looking even more scary when I first met him. I take a step back not really sure of him. He scares me. "Breakfast is down stairs" He says raising an eye brow at me. I nod my head then shut the door.

I don't wanna be mean to him but he just scares me. I walk into the bathroom so I can do my business and take a shower. I quickly clean myself then get out grabbing a big fluffy white towel wrapping it around myself. I walk out of the bathroom and walk into the closet so I can change. I look around for a few minutes not sure what to wear. Father always made me wear outfits that were to tight and showed off most of my body. I hesitantly grab a pair of jeans and a long sleeved shirt. I slip on a pair of boxers then the loose fitting jeans and then the long sleeve.

I walk out of my room making my way to the kitchen because I don't know where the dining room is. As I walk down the stairs I see Anthony talking on the phone. Once at the bottom of the stairs I stop next to him and hesitantly look up. "I'll be back tomorrow. Just move my meeting to the afternoon and if that doesn't work tell them they can wait" He practically growls into the phone. His eyes are closed and he looks annoyed. "I don't care if they cancel the dumb thing all together Hazel. They are the ones who wanted a meeting with me in the first place! And if they cancel then they can take their shit company and shove it up there ignorant asses!" He sneers making me move away. He sounds mad, like really mad.

It's my fault. He is only here because of me, if he didn't get me he could be where he needs to be. Tears well in my eyes and I squeeze them shut. No, stop it. I shouldn't cry. I wipe my eyes then look back up at Anthony who is now staring at me.

"Did you sleep okay?" He asked beginning to walk to the kitchen and I follow after. We both take a seat at the island table. Jim walks out of 5e kitchen and sets a plate in front of me then one in front of Anthony. Mine has eggs, bacon and a piece of toast and so does Anthony's. Jim walks back to the kitchen and I realize that I didn't answer Anthony's questions. "I uhm I slept o-okay" I answered picking up the fork that was placed on the plate. Even though the dream was still in my head I didn't say anything other then that. I don't think Anthony wants to hear any of that.

I put a small fork full of eggs in my mouth chewing slowly then swallowing. We eat in silence which kind of makes me uncomfortable but I get threw it. I go to grab Anthony's plate but Jim beats me to it and takes both of our plates. I frown lowering my head. I hate not washing the dishes that I ate from. I hate not doing anything. I quickly stand up making Anthony look at me. "I'll be in my room" I mutter the rush away.

I can feel the panic raising in me and my stomach twists not wanting to keep the food I just ate. "Declan? Declan wait" I don't turn back. I can't. I can feel the bile rising in my throat. I open my door not bothering to close it so I can rush into the bathroom. I throw up everything I just ate. Tears roll down my face and a sob escapes my mouth. After a few seconds I flush the toilet and get off the hard tile. I wipe my face quickly then walk back into my room. Anthony stands in the door way a concerned look on his face.

He really met it when he said he wouldn't walk in here. When he sees me he clears his throat. "Are you okay?" He asked. Tears fall again and I look at him. "I n-need to do s-something" I cry hating that I'm crying in front of him. Father always hit me when I cried I'm front of him. I run my hands threw my hand slightly pulling at the strands. "I feel s-so u-useless! So l-lazy!" I sob dropping my hands to my sides. Anthony just watches with that concerned look on his face. Until he steps into the room and walks over to my at a steady pace. My heart picks up and my breath hitches. He stops when he's right in front of me, he raises on of his hands and I flinch back but the hit doesn't come. His hand gently cups my cheek his thumb softly rubbing under my eye.

"He did this to you. The panic attacks, the crying, and the flinching" He states. I look up at him, his eyes soft and warm. He sighs dropping his hand and I would be lying if I said I wasn't disappointed. "Declan, I want you to know that I will never put my hands on you. I won't ever hit you and I will never use you like they" He says firmly.

I search his face, no, he is lying. He will hurt me. He will use me like they do. Like they all do! I step back tears flooding my eyes. "N-No, y-you- you a-are l-lying! They all lie!" I scream at him. My breathing is heaver and can see straight. "Y-you are g-going to use me like the rest!" A sob escapes my mouth.

"Declan please, please calm down. I promise I won't" His voice is closer. "We can fix the problem Declan. I can give you a job and you can work" He says softly. My eyes stay on the floor at the tears stop and my breathing gets steady. "Declan? Love?" He reaches for me. Love? Did he call me that? I slowly look up at him my eyes wide. "L-Love?" I repeat. He touches my cheek and sighs. "What job would you like?" He asked changing the subject.

I chew on my lip at he rubs under my eye again with his thumb. "I'm good at being a waiter" I mumble. Then my eyes widen. "N-no! Please don't let people touch me!" I whimper balling my hands. He shakes his head grabbing one of my balled fists with his free hand. "Never. In plus a normal waiter doesn't get touched or wear revealing outfits" He said. I furrow my eyebrows in confusion. "They don't?" I ask. He huffs. "God no. I do know a place that is hiring and I know the owner" He answers. He drops my hand and removes his hand from my face.

He smiles, "we can go there in a few days. I want you to rest for a few days and before you say anything, you can help Jim or the maids if you'd like" He says. I nod my head then he walks out shutting the door behind him.

Even though it's morning I could use a nap. I quickly change then climb into bed hoping no nightmares or dreams come. Just a peaceful sleep then I can help the others around the house.