Wish We Never Started

13

1 MONTH LATER
NEW YEAR'S EVE

Diego gives me three outfits to chose from, all splayed out on the floor in front of me.

The first one I've already eliminated, so it's down to the second and third choice. His shop is closed and so we've taken over – or more like he's taken over his own shop.

I stand in front of one of the full body mirrors, checking out the second outfit again. Holding it in front of my body and then next to it, back and forth like a teenage girl unable to pick a dress for prom.

I like this particular outfit because it's the simplest one. The simpler, the better.

It's just a vintage white graphic tee, denim button down, and some cool brown pants Diego pulled out of a dusty box in the back.

The chime on the door rings, alerting both Diego and me. We both look at each other, startled, but the expression quickly washes away from Diego's face before I see who it is.

Amelia comes into the store, happily skipping over to where we're stationed.

"Hey hotties," she says, smiling at Diego first.

"You just reminded me that I need to lock that door now," he says with relief in his voice.

Once he turns his back, Amelia directs her attention to me. She has this soft smile that is cute and innocent and youthful.

She bounces over to me and wraps her arms around my neck, kissing it softly with a peck. I'd love to inject just one ounce of her energy into my veins.

"Aw, so disgusting," Diego coos as he comes back from locking the front door, bombarding our hug and turning it into a group affair.

He squeezes us all closer together and I hear Amelia giggling, trying to break away first.

When she's free of the hug pile, she stares at Diego and I for a few seconds because we're still hugging. Her arms slot between us, like a kid trying to break their parents apart.

We share a knowing glance, that we're both doing this to be annoying, and at the same time we let go with identical grins.

"I just wanted to stop by before I head home. Tomorrow morning we start our road trip to Wisconsin for Granny's funeral," Amelia changes the subject as she stands between us.

"I'm sorry again," Diego says, pivoting to pick up the outfits I didn't choose.

Part of me wonders why Amelia didn't tell me about this, but I let it go because deep down I don't really care that she didn't say anything.

"It's okay," Amelia says, instinctively grabbing my hand and lacing our fingers together. She leans against me, her head on my chest, "I'm just thankful I'm able to take this time off."

Diego nods, folding the clothes perfectly with a skillful ease.

"Yeah, of course. Just let me know when you're back here and ready."

This probably means Shannon is going to be working more hours. The thought that she gets to benefit from this makes me sick to my stomach.

"I'll see you when I get back?" Amelia looks up at me with her big, dark brown eyes. She looks sad, even though we could talk every day still.

"Of course you will," I tell her, kissing her forehead. She closes her eyes and presses her cheek back against my chest.

"Behave tonight," she whispers, squeezing my hand.

If this was a real relationship, tonight would be my first big test. A New Year's Eve party by myself. Would I be able to behave myself?

I roll my eyes, but she isn't looking. Of course I could behave myself.

"It's just my co-worker's... thing. There's going to be, like, four of us."

"Whatever," Amelia says cautiously, like she knows better.

I cup her face, pressing a few quick kisses against her lips. She turns around and tries to pull away playfully, but I wrap my arm around her waist and pull her back.

"Seriously," I say, looking into her eyes again, "just one real kiss before you go and I will feel a lot better."

This time, she hugs me, giving me the real kiss I asked for.

Her lips start moving from mine to my jawline, then my neck, and then my ear. Her nose brushes my skin and I feel her warm breath with each movement. Somehow, her hands find their way under my shirt, too.

"Hey," I mumble, "I just said a kiss, yeah?"

She giggles, scraping her teeth against my skin before pulling away entirely. I'm not sure when she became such a tease.

"I'll text you later," she whispers before walking towards the door, leaving me with a wink.

When she's gone, I let out a sigh and plop down onto a chair that's nearby.

"I gotta put a sign up about PDA now?" Diego says jokingly, coming out of the back room with a new rack of shirts.

"I have no clue," I say, shaking my head when it dawns on me that I never even noticed Diego leaving.

"What are you guys?" He asks while looking through the fresh rack.

"We're not exclusive, but we're dating, I guess? At least that's how she explained it this weekend and I'm just going along with it."

Diego shakes his head and makes and unapproving noise.

"Last time that didn't work out too well for me. Remember Gina?"

I nod, remembering Gina crystal clear. She was a woman Diego met at a club one night – they made out the entire time and then had sex that led to some sort of friends with benefits situation. Then, that led to "but we're not exclusive," and ultimately bad feelings and an even worse break up.

Kind of like Amelia and me.

"But we haven't hooked up yet. At least not like... full sex. Maybe that's for the better? Like our emotions aren't fully involved yet or something. I don't know, you always seem to handle one night stands really well and I just try to avoid them."

Diego considers my words and nods, swapping shirts from rack to rack. I know he's listening. He's always been a very good listener.

"You like her?" He asks, looking over his shoulder at me to see how I respond.

"Yes. I like her. Everything is easy with us. I don't feel like I'm walking on eggshells like with Sofia. I think she's a little quirky but really cute, also. I think she likes me, right?"

"Bro," Diego says in a more serious tone, "I know she likes you. She really likes you. So just a heads up. Really likes you," he says with wide eyes the second time.

A pit in my stomach forms when I realize what I'm getting myself into. All it took was Diego to solidify what Amelia and me are getting ourselves into may become messy.

I wish I was at Sadie's party already and on the verge of blacking out.