meet me at midnight

chapter 7

Always the artist, never the muse.

It was the same thing that kept on replaying inside my head as I stare at my laptop, in hopes of typing more words so that I can finally finish this poem that our Prof. made us do as an activity. I'm currently inside the library, hoping I can finish it if I'm in a quiet place, but I was wrong.

I can't think of anything to type.

All my mind could do right this moment was remember that I never once given a written poem, it was always me who does it. I was never the muse of any artwork. In fact, I was the artist all the time, that I can't help but wonder what it would feel like to have someone write me a poem or draw me a portrait someday.

But I knew it was all wishful thinking.

I decided to leave the library, and walk towards our usual hangout spot, since I was already done with my morning classes, well, except for this activity that I needed to finish. But, I guess I can just do it later or even just use my old  poems that would never see the day.

"Yo!" I greeted Sohee who was already sitting at our usual hangout place. I was glad to see him, since I wanted  to have company while waiting for the others. Sohee gave me a smile when he saw me, before presenting a manga in front of me.

"No way, you still read this?" I can't help but ask, since it was a haikyuu manga, which we had finished reading back when we were in senior high school.

"Hear me out, the girl I like is addicted to this series, so I need to show her that I'm also interested in it." Sohee reasoned out, making me laugh. I can't believe guys actually do this thing just for the girl they like to notice them.

I thought it was only us girls who do it. I did it multiple times in the past since I wanted to grow closer with Anton, the only thing I wasn't able to pretend that I like that Anton loves, was swimming. I'd drown if I ever enter a pool.

"So, who's the girl?" I can't help but ask Sohee, since he was never the serious type, so it was really new whenever he'd mention a girl he seriously likes in the group.

"An Art Studies major. She's really pretty and kind, but I can't disclose her name yet. Soon," he teased, making me laugh again since he always does this, but most of the time, he'd end up never introducing the girl to us because he was too shy to make a move.

I wish he'd make a move now. I realized that making the first move changes so many things for us.

"I hope it works out this time," I told him sincerely.

"I hope you and Anton work out too. You two look cute together, you know?" he teased, making me roll my eyes. I almost forgot that he knew that I like Anton.

Speaking of Anton. Our set up is kinda funny, since we have to act as if I just didn't confessed to him, and when I told him that I'll be trying to change his mind, I was only given every midnight to do it since it was the only time there aren't any eyes watching us.

I'm so fucking scared of what Sungchan will think if he ever finds out what we're doing. I mean, it was already years ago when he said that he'd break anybody's bones who mess with me, but he won't do that to Anton, right? I mean, I would be the one at fault if I ever get hurt in the end, since it was me who made the first move, right?

And about the midnight thingy, I don't really know how I'll be able to pull it off, but I have no choice but to think of something to make it possible. And, chatting is one of the plans I have. Yeah, as boring as  that sounds, it'd be perfect for us both.

I'm shy when talking to Anton in person, so maybe, in chat, I'll be able to talk to him without constantly embarrassing myself.

"You're both early. Again. Are you sure you're not skipping your classes?" Jiwoo asked us in a nagging way, making Sohee and I glance at each other before giving Jiwoo a mischievous smile.