The WAR: A Story of Family

10. No News is Good News

"I want to reach out and grab his hand and hold it to me, right over my heart, right where it aches the most. I don't know if doing that would heal me or make my heart break entirely, but either way this constant hungry waiting would be over."

WAITING

It had only been a few days, yet it felt as if the skin of his palms had grown fast to the steel hilt of his sword.

Alistair felt the existence of his body in the tension that rolled through him, his wrists, his shoulders, and the blade in his hand – the tension had gathered into the single determination of pressure – the steel blade sinking into the body of the enemy over and over again, many men, different faces, and he had finally become numb.

Alistair was powerful and he was deadly with the blade, and he was their weapon.

His superiors ignored his use of both magic and steel in battle.  They turned a blind eye to his sorcery.

He had been called for a reason, certainly not to merely patrol as he had suggested to Avyanna. No, not after they had been met with resistance trying to take back a town overrun with raiders and invaders.  Violence against violence.  Magic against magic.

Three days had turned into more than a week.

Alistair had become deprived of emotion, deadened inwardly as he unleashed every killing blow.  It had become a battle between his muscles and survival.

He was tired.  But he liked the emptiness of his body's exhaustion. It reminded him that he was still alive.

He thought of Avyanna any chance he got, reveled in the fact that she was safe, and hopefully happy, and he would watch with curiosity the emotion the thoughts of her summoned in him. He would say to himself, well, here it is again. Emotion. Missing her. Wanting her.  He would wait to see how long the yearning lasted. It gave him a strange pleasure to watch himself fight it, and he could almost forget that it was his own suffering, and he would smile at his own agony.

With Alistair gone time seemed to have come to a standstill for Avyanna. The more she missed him and craved his presence the longer each day stretched on.

On the third day Avyanna had woken up with a burst of emotion because Alistair would be home today.

He had said three days.

But Alistair hadn't returned on the third day.  He had said he would be away for three days.  Afterall he was just on a patrol. Three days.

Three days had come and gone.

Avyanna continued to head into Gilder to her students.  Fully aware of the new faces the battles across the border had pushed into the city.

She threw herself into the lessons, and the children's eagerness and rowdiness gave her the escape she needed to think of nothing else but attending to their educational requirements.

She left Gilder each day later than she would have if Alistair weren't away, much to Jon's anger and exasperation.

But by the time she was home she was tired, and she ate quickly and alone, and she fell into bed.

It was hard to fall asleep though. For a manor teeming with people Alistair's wing of the estate was unnaturally quiet. Avyanna would lay still with her eyes open, and she saw the lights of evening, night-shadows of deep blue and black, and far off she could hear the sweet song of the howl of the cold wind outside.

She would lay on Alistair's side of the bed when she finally closed her eyes and fell asleep.

After the incident at Stormville, she decided to remain in the manor and busy herself there instead.